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Writing Samples
Band 6

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In today’s fast-paced world, healthcare has become an important concern in many societies. Some
people
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 believe that the average standard of human
health
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 will decline in the future.
However
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, I strongly disagree with
this
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 view. I believe that
health
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 standards are more likely to improve
due to
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 technological advancement, greater awareness, and better access to resources. On the one hand,
people
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 today are more
health
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-conscious than ever before, largely thanks to the spread of information through technology and social media. Individuals now have easier access to reliable
health
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 information, which helps them make informed decisions about diet and lifestyle.
For example
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, since the COVID-19 pandemic, more
people
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 have focused on eating healthy, avoiding processed foods, and adopting active lifestyles.
This
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 shift in
behavior
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behaviour
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 reflects a broader awareness of physical and mental well-being.
On the other hand
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, global economic growth has led to major investments in agriculture and food quality. Many countries are using modern equipment and organic farming techniques to produce healthier food. Campaigns
such
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 as “Farm to Family” have encouraged consumers to prioritize natural, high-quality ingredients.
As a result
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,
people
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 are not only more informed but
also
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 more willing to invest in their
health
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 through better nutrition and exercise. In conclusion, the combination of improved technology, increased awareness, and rising economic standards suggests that human
health
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 is likely to improve, not decline. With continued focus on
health
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 education and quality of life, I believe future generations will enjoy better
overall
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health
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.

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Task Achievement
Expand on your points with more specific examples or data to strengthen your arguments further. For instance, you could include statistics about health trends over time or specific technological advancements that have improved health.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider using more varied cohesive devices to enhance the flow of your essay. While your structure is sound, adding phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'Moreover' can help connect your ideas even more fluidly.
Task Achievement
You have a strong thesis statement that clearly expresses your opinion, which sets a focused tone for the rest of the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction effectively sets up the discussion, and your conclusion succinctly ties together your main points and reiterates your stance.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • 1. Standard of health
  • 2. Average
  • 3. Lower
  • 4. Future
  • 5. Aging population
  • 6. Chronic diseases
  • 7. Sedentary lifestyle
  • 8. Lack of exercise
  • 9. Poor dietary habits
  • 10. Environmental pollution
  • 11. Technological advancements
  • 12. Impact on health
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