Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while other think that there aremore important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

There are two different views on having a successful life, one point of view looks

from

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show examples

hard

work

Use synonyms

and

determination

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

others see money and appearance as an indication of leading a great life.

While

Linking Words

I can understand both sides,

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I think hard

work

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and

determination

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have more impact on

someone

Use synonyms

successfulness

Replace the word

success

show examples

. Our effort

on doing

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to do

show examples

something

dilligently

Correct your spelling

diligently

are

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show examples

an apparent thing that

people

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can see or understand. Hard

work

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and

determination

Use synonyms

are always unmeasurable as it is an abstract

items

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item

show examples

which does not

Add a missing verb

have a

show examples

physical shape. It can only be seen when the job has finished and

showing

Wrong verb form

shows

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

results.

For example

Linking Words

, a man in India

digged

Correct your spelling

dug

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a tunnel

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

for 10 years, because there was not a hospital in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

city he was in. Everyone

are

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mocking him and cast him out, but only after the way was finished, the society

praised

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praise

show examples

him. To be successful

while

Linking Words

doing hard

work

Use synonyms

and

determination

Use synonyms

can take a long time, but the results are always worth the journey.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, an easy way to show that we have a successful life is to show our wealth by having luxurious items, sharing photos of extravagant trips overseas, or

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apply

show examples

owning a sports car.

This

Linking Words

will make

people

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admires

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admire

show examples

us and make us feel

well known

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well-known

show examples

and

respect

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respected

show examples

However

Linking Words

usually

Add a comma

usually,

show examples

this

Linking Words

happens for only

awhile

Correct your spelling

a while

show examples

or until the

wealthiness

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wealth

show examples

runs out.

For example

Linking Words

, a lottery winner in Australia

got

Verb problem

became

show examples

instant famous and respected by

Use synonyms

people

Correct article usage

the people

show examples

surrounding him. Since

then

Linking Words

, he changed his lifestyle dramatically, from collecting bottles for recycling

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apply

show examples

to going to a club

everyday

Correct your spelling

every day

show examples

spending thousands of dollars. Without

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apply

show examples

proper money management, he went bankrupt a year after and

people

Use synonyms

started to forget about him. In conclusion, it is true that money and appearance can make

someone

Use synonyms

looks

Correct subject-verb agreement

look

show examples

successful, but

this

Linking Words

effect will only

last

Linking Words

for a short time. Meanwhile, hard

work

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and dedication can take

someone

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to reach their goal with a longer or even lifetime successful impact

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show examples

themselves or even

Use synonyms

people

Correct article usage

the people

show examples

surrounds

Wrong verb form

surrounding

show examples

them. I believe it is more meaningful to measure

someone

Use synonyms

successfulness

Replace the word

success

show examples

based on their effort as

this

Linking Words

leave

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leaves

show examples

a memorable effect on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society and could motivate other

people

Use synonyms

to do the same.

gabriellajessiliaSat May 10 2025

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task achievement

Try to avoid using phrases like 'I can understand both sides, but...' as they may weaken your argument. Instead, present a clear stance right from the beginning.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure that every paragraph has a clear topic sentence that relates back to your main argument. This will help improve clarity and structure.

coherence and cohesion

Vary your sentence structure and use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your writing style. This can help convey your ideas more effectively.

task achievement

You provided relevant examples and real-life scenarios, which strengthened your arguments.

task achievement

The essay addresses both views in a balanced manner, demonstrating a fair consideration of the topic.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

370 words

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Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while other think that there aremore important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Many people believe that social networking sites have had a huge negative atibe impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree.

Nowadays nations are becoming more interesting and developing better thanks to mixing of different nationalities and cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people believe that radio is the best way to get news while others think that television is better for this purpose. Discuss both views and give your opinion with relevant examples.