Many agricultural lands are being converted into commercial centres. How does this affect the environment and people’s lifestyle? Discuss this situation and provide suggestions to address these issues. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

Significant
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A significant
The significant
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number of
an
Correct article usage
apply
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agriculture’s
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agriculture
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lands becoming
a commercial
Correct the article-noun agreement
a commercial centre
commercial centres
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centres
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. In my opinion,
this
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situation notably influences
natural
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the natural
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environment
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.
Therefore
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, it
also
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affects
people’s
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lifestyle
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.
This
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essay will present my viewpoint and discuss relevant arguments. Taking a look at the
environment
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, it can be clearly seen that destroying the natural landscapes, affects it seriously. Plants and trees are
main
Correct article usage
the main
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producers of oxygen on the planet Earth
due to
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photosynthesis they are able to change carbon dioxide into highly needed oxygen.
As a result
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of
this
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process, air
in
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is
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less polluted. To change agricultural lands into commercial
centres
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, the process of deforestation needs to occur. Taking
level
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the level
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of pollution in the cities, as an example,
according to
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BBC it is much higher than in the countryside,
thus
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is valid that flora helps to clean the air.
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Although not
Correct word choice
Not
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only
environment
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is influenced by destroying agricultural landscapes, but
people’s
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Use synonyms
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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also
Linking Words
highly affected.
According to
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WHO, humans are able to relax and calm down better in the natural green
environment
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.
In addition
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, spending free time in the places like forests
,
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apply
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helps to improve mental health.
For instance
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, most of the premium spa resorts are built in the countryside,
due to
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fact
Correct article usage
the fact
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that
costumers
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customers
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prefer to relax close to
the
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apply
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nature.
Overall
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,
rapid
Correct article usage
the rapid
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grow
Replace the word
growth
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of
a commercial
Correct the article-noun agreement
commercial centres
a commercial centre
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centres
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,
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
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people
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people's
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ability to relax and
also
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affect
Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
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mental health in
bad
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a bad
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manner.
Thus
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,
people’s
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lifestyle
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is more stressful and poorer quality.
To conclude
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, I believe that changing agricultural landscapes into commercial
centres
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is a negative trend
,
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apply
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because it affects
Use synonyms
environment
Add an article
the environment
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and
people’s
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Use synonyms
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
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in a negative way. To explicate, it makes
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environment
Add an article
the environment
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more polluted and
way
Correct article usage
the way
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of living more stressful.

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task achievement
Try to provide a clearer thesis statement that outlines the main points you will discuss in your essay. This will help guide your reader and establish a stronger connection between your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your paragraphs flow logically from one to the next. Use linking words and phrases to enhance coherence between your ideas, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Adding more specific examples or case studies could strengthen your arguments. More detailed illustrations can better support your points about the impact on the environment and people's lifestyles.
task achievement
You have successfully identified the main issues affecting both the environment and people's lifestyles, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction provides a clear outline of what your essay will discuss, setting a good foundation for your arguments.
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