IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

It has been argued that gift giving should not be encouraged, because money is often wasted on things that people do not like or want. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

2.5 / 9
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Introduction
Presents are a way
of
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for
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 people
expressing
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to express
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 their love
to
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for
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 their dear ones. It has nothing to do with the monetary terms. Gifts are given on special
ocassions
Correct your spelling
occasions
 like
birthday
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birthdays
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, weddings and graduation ceremonies. But some people believe that giving handouts is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
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 of money . I completely disagree with the statement.
Body paragraph 1
To begin
Linking Words
with
Add a comma
with,
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 the
positives
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positive
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 of handing out presents is that it makes
the
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apply
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another
Correct quantifier usage
other
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 soul happy and special. Not only it
brings
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bring
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the
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a
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 smile
on
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to
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 the other
persons
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person's
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 face but it
turns
Rephrase
also turns
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 into a memory.
For instance
Linking Words
,
i
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I
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 remember a
scenerio
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scenario
 when my brother gave me
a
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an
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apple
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Apple
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 9 series watch on my birthday. I was over the moon after receiving the gift.
Body paragraph 2
Furtermore
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Furthermore
, gifts are
token
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tokens
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 of love. It is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 way to show that the other person cares about you. It builds the social and emotional connection between the individuals. Handmade items mitigate the issue of unwanted items.
Conclusion
In
coclusion
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conclusion
, gifts not only
builds
Correct subject-verb agreement
build
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the
Correct article usage
a
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 sense of community and belonging but it
brings
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bring
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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sentimentality
among
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to
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 the relations.

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task achievement
Ensure that your thesis statement clearly presents your position on the topic.
coherence
Improve your paragraph transitions for better flow between ideas.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points about the benefits of gift giving.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear stance against the idea that gift giving is a waste of money.
coherence
You discussed the emotional aspects of gift giving that add depth to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sentimentality
  • tradition
  • consumerism
  • personalization
  • thoughtfulness
  • reciprocity
  • intentions
  • social norms
  • emotional connection
  • materialism
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