Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some argue that teaching the new generation how to be a good member of society is a parental job,
while
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others think
this
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is the school's responsibility. I believe, that
while
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the immediate family has a significant role in educating adolescents, the effects of the academy on junior minds are undeniable and more remarkable. On the one hand, children usually mimic their parents and try to copy their behaviours, so if any parental figures act respectfully and make an effort to have a positive impact on the public, it would make a great example to be followed by the child, say caring about our neighbourhood by learning how to divide the trash for recycling from young ages.
On the other hand
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, most little ones spend the majority of their time in school from elementary to college, learning stuff that would be useful for them in life. Giving them tasks which are fruitful down the line, and
also
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there could be a lot of experiences and events which could prepare them about society and being a useful and active part of it by making a situation better,
such
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as charity events about the environment or cancer treatment.
Furthermore
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, there is an extreme level of problems in the public which easily could be solved by just a good community or even teamwork between the public members, which are the essential abilities that could be learnt in
a
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academic place by completing tasks or projects as a team. In conclusion, I think both guardians and school are essential for youths to acquire the knowledge of how to be a useful part of the community, even though the latter has a more significant impact on the mindset of children.

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Consider providing more specific examples to support your points, as this will help enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs for a smoother reading experience. Connect your ideas more explicitly to strengthen the coherence of your essay.
task achievement
You have presented both views effectively and provided your own opinion clearly in the conclusion, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your use of varied vocabulary and sentence structures is commendable, which adds interest to your writing.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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