It is more important for student to learn about local history than world history, To what extend do you agree or disagree.

History

Use synonyms

is a vital subject that helps students to understand the past and how it has shaped

present

Add an article

the present

show examples

While

Linking Words

some

people

Use synonyms

argue that local

history

Use synonyms

is more essential than

world

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay will agree

with

Change preposition

that

show examples

both are important

role

Fix the agreement mistake

roles

show examples

among the population and

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

should learn

mix

Add an article

a mix

show examples

of them at the same time. On the one hand, local

history

Use synonyms

ensures huge benefits

such

Linking Words

as heritage and pride in students’

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

. They may achieve to realise all old actions like wars or famous historical places within a short period.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, local

history

Use synonyms

is the main source of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

one person’s previous ancestors and habits. If someone tries to acquire broad information about his local

history

Use synonyms

, he would feel

Remove the article

apply

show examples

pride inside himself.

Additionally

Linking Words

, there are some wise thoughts among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

elderly

people

Use synonyms

According to

Linking Words

their outlook, if inhabitants

have

Add a missing verb

do have

show examples

not any knowledge about their local

history

Use synonyms

,they may lose

country’s

Correct article usage

the country’s

show examples

origin in the future.

Hence

Linking Words

, all citizens should

give

Verb problem

pay

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

attention to their historical events like big revolutions and wars which took happen in their areas. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

Ministry

Correct article usage

the Ministry

show examples

of Science and Education Republic of Azerbaijan added the second Karabakh war which Azerbaijan soldiers won a battle against Armenia to all

history

Use synonyms

lessons.

On the other hand

Linking Words

world

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

has a crucial impact on students’ welfare, including: outlook about all states and places.If a learner engages with

world

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of focusing just local historical events may get

Remove the article

apply

show examples

more background. Because there are a lot of important facts in

history

Use synonyms

which

Correct word choice

that

show examples

almost everyone should know about them

such

Linking Words

World

Use synonyms

War I,

World

Use synonyms

War II and so on.

Furthermore

Linking Words

world

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

consists of some changes like industrial revolution levels and these

datas

Correct your spelling

data

indeed help to enter international relationships easily. Because mostly part of the

peopulation

Correct your spelling

population

another

Change preposition

to another

show examples

country at least one time in their life and

world

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

accelerates a dialogue between foreign individuals.

For instance

Linking Words

, based on a report

Change preposition

show examples

Times

Correct article usage

the Times

show examples

journal, half of

Use synonyms

people

Add an article

the people

show examples

in the

world

Use synonyms

know that the first underground railway was established in London in 1863. In conclusion, the prevalence of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history

Use synonyms

among students brings 2 key subjects:

world

Use synonyms

and local

history

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

some

people

Use synonyms

think local

history

Use synonyms

is more essential for learners, l prefer to emphasize that both are crucial and pupils should try to make a balance between them.

World

Use synonyms

history

Use synonyms

increases outlook

in contrast

Linking Words

,local

history

Use synonyms

boost

Change the verb form

boosts

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

heritage and pride among students.

i.nureddinnWed May 21 2025

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task achievement

The essay provides a general view on local and world history, but some ideas could be clearer. Try to explain your points with more detail to make your argument stronger.

coherence and cohesion

To improve your logical structure, use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph. This helps guide the reader through your ideas better.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction should clearly state your opinion on the issue. Make sure to express your main argument directly in the introduction.

coherence and cohesion

Try to connect your ideas better within and between sentences. Using linking words can help improve the flow of your writing.

task achievement

You've highlighted the importance of both local and world history, which provides a balanced view.

task achievement

Your examples from local and world history add depth to your argument, making it more relatable.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

403 words

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It is more important for student to learn about local history than world history, To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Your opinion

Some people believe that children should leran to paint and draw. Others believe that it is a waste of time. Discuss both wiews and give your own opinion.

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that individuals today are more dependent on each other. Others believe people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.