Some people think that tourism benefits the host country. Others think that tourism causes problems for the host country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, many individuals think that
tourism
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gives advantages to the
host
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country
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,
while
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others think that
tourism
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has a bad impact on the
host
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country
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. I agree with the latter statement since I saw much evidence from my own
country
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.
Moreover
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,
this
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essay will elaborate on both of these views,
for instance
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how
tourism
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gives many job opportunities, but it
also
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generates crimes. Many countries get their funding from the
tourism
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industry.
This
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circumstance happens because
this
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field produces some job opportunities,
such
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as staff for hotels or restaurants. To illustrate, Bali, which is one of the famous cities in Indonesia, has many tourists who want to go there for a holiday and expatriates who want to stay there. Some global investors see
this
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situation as a lucrative opportunity.
Therefore
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, they make many businesses in Bali, from accommodations, restaurants, cafes, etc. Many local people have
chance
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a chance
show examples
to work in those places.
This
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is a positive value for a
country
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to reduce the unemployment rate and enhance the state's income.
However
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,
tourism
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can bring drawbacks for the
host
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country
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,
such
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as criminals and behavioural changes in society. To illustrate, lately, some media in Indonesia published articles about Bali's crimes have gotten higher than before. Many tourists do some illegal activities,
such
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as narcotics trade, unlicensed profession, etc.
Moreover
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, some expatriates bring their cultures to Indonesia and few of them have a negative effect on citizens, especially adolescents and young adults.
For instance
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, drinking alcohol, wearing skimpy outfits, etc. Many young local people are influenced and follow their trends. It has a negative impact on social cultures. In conclusion, I agree that the disadvantages of
tourism
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to the
host
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country
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outweigh the advantages.
Tourism
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causes some people to commit crimes and negative behaviours.
Thus
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, the government should make regulations to prevent those activities.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and clearly supports your overall argument.
task achievement
Strengthen your introduction by clearly stating both views before giving your opinion.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points, especially on the negative impacts of tourism.
task achievement
You provided a clear opinion in your introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Your examples from Bali effectively illustrate the job opportunities created by tourism.
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