IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that
professionals
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such
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 as doctors and engineers should be required to
work
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 in the
country
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 where they received their training,
while
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 others believe they should be free to
work
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 anywhere they choose.
This
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 essay will examine both perspectives before presenting my own view. On the one hand, many believe that skilled
professionals
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 should remain in the
country
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 that
provided
Wrong verb form
provides
show examples
 their education. In many cases, governments invest heavily in the training of medical and technical experts by offering scholarships, subsidies, or free education.
As a result
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, it is reasonable to expect these individuals to give back to the
country
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 by serving its citizens.
This
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 is particularly important in countries facing shortages of skilled workers, where the migration of
professionals
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 could negatively impact public health and infrastructure.
On the other hand
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, others argue that people should not be obligated to
work
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 in a specific
country
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 simply because they studied there. Personal freedom and mobility are essential human rights. People may have family reasons, career opportunities, or personal preferences that lead them to seek
work
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 abroad.
Furthermore
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, forcing someone to stay in a
country
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 may reduce their motivation or productivity, which can ultimately be counterproductive. Personally, I believe
professionals
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 should have the freedom to decide where they want to live and
work
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.
Although
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 they may have benefited from public funding,
this
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 should not override their right to choose what is best for their life and career. In conclusion,
while
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 some argue that trained
professionals
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 owe a debt to the
country
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 that educated them, I believe the freedom to choose where to
work
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 is more important and should be respected.

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task achievement
Make sure to give a few specific examples to support your points. For example, you could mention a country that has suffered from a shortage of doctors due to brain drain.
coherence and cohesion
Try to link your paragraphs more clearly. Using words like 'firstly', 'next', or 'finally' can help the reader follow your ideas better.
task achievement
You could strengthen your introduction by briefly explaining why this topic is important today. This helps engage the reader more.
task achievement
You clearly present both sides of the argument and provide your opinion, which is good for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps the reader understand your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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