IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that children should be allowed to stay at home and play until they are six or seven years old. Others believe that it is important for young children to go to school as soon as possible. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, the topic of when a group should start school has become more important.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both sides of the argument and give my own opinion. Some people think
children
Use synonyms
 should stay at home until they are six or seven years old. One reason is that young kids need more time with their families to feel safe and loved.
For example
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, staying at home helps them build a strong bond with their parents.
As a result
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, they may grow up feeling more confident and emotionally healthy.
On the other hand
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, others believe that going to the academy early is better. They say
children
Use synonyms
 can start learning basic skills like reading, numbers, and communication.
For instance
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, kids who go to
academy
Correct article usage
the academy
show examples
 early often learn how to work with others and follow rules.
This
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 shows that early education can help
children
Use synonyms
 get ready for the future. In my opinion, it is better for
children
Use synonyms
 to start school at a young age, around four or five.
This
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 is because early education can support their brain development and help them learn important social skills. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 some people believe
children
Use synonyms
 should stay at home longer, others think early schooling is more helpful. I believe that going to school USE SYNONYMS academydepartmentfacultyhallinstituteinstitutionseminaryuniversitycollegediscipline It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score. earlier can give
children
Use synonyms
 a strong start in both learning and social life.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly support your main points with examples that connect back to the question.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use varied vocabulary instead of repeating the same words or phrases.
task achievement
Ensure you finish your conclusion fully to summarize your views and key points.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and provide both sides of the argument.
task achievement
Your opinion is clear and stated in your essay, which is good for task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emotional development
  • cognitive development
  • secure attachments
  • imaginative play
  • problem-solving skills
  • creativity
  • structured environment
  • academic readiness
  • language skills
  • social interaction
  • anxiety
  • diverse social settings
  • social skills
  • play-based curriculum
  • independence
  • working parents
  • educational setting
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