A large income is much more important than being satisfied at work. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

There is no denying the fact that a higher salary and being comfortable are essential things for employees. It is a commonly held belief that
people
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always choose to have a higher income than be satisfied. There is
also
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an argument that opposite it. In my opinion, I consider that having a better environment is more important than having a large income
To begin
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with, Most of the
people
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in the world stay at the same job for most of their life.
In other words
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, spending your life in a toxic environment will reduce the productivity of your work and that will make you uncomfortable.
In addition
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, work is
also
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considered a home for most of society, so
people
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always try to make it a safe place.
For example
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, having a friendly community at your warehouse
,
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apply
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will increase the enjoyable time your work so
people
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will find it as home. Another point to consider, having a workspace where caring about
money
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will cause more problems, it is
also
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possible to say that, grading and caring about
money
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will cause problems among the employees, and that will affect the company's income, which causes
people
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to get fired.
Moreover
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, as a person of knowledge, I know the effect of the problem will not
also
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damage the company and will affect the future of each person who works there.
For instance
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,
money
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will stop
people
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to continue get more knowledge about their majors. In conclusion, despite
people
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having various views, I believe that being satisfied and living comfortably is better than any
money
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in the
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world
worl
Correct your spelling
world

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coherence and cohesion
The introduction could be clearer by stating your main argument more directly.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader.
task achievement
Avoid repetition in your arguments; make sure to present new ideas in each paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure that your conclusion summarizes your main points more effectively.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear opinion that working in a good environment is important.
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