IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The cost of international travel is decreasing, and tourism is increasing in many countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of the rising trend of tourism for countries? AAA

Nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
travel
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 being reduced in many
countries
Use synonyms
,and
tourism
Use synonyms
 is being developed in different
countries
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay believes
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
benefit
Add an article
the benefit
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 of
this
Linking Words
trent
Correct your spelling
trend
 influences positively to
Add an article
the economical
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economical
Correct word choice
economic
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 situation ,because of increasing outcomes ,
while
Linking Words
 drawback can
causes
Change the verb form
cause
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 crucial issues to
Correct article usage
the enviromental
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enviromental
Correct your spelling
environmental
system
Use synonyms
,especially,
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the animals. On one hand,
tourism
Use synonyms
 has become a major catalyst of
Correct article usage
the economical
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economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
system
Use synonyms
.
Countries
Use synonyms
 ,which have
touristic
Replace the word
tourist
show examples
 attractions ,are more developing rather than
countries
Use synonyms
 which do not increase their
tourism
Use synonyms
.It's cause of profits,which
earned
Add a missing verb
are earned
show examples
 from
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
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activities
Change preposition
of activities
show examples
 in the travelling
system
Use synonyms
.It
also
Linking Words
 gives
sustainable
Correct article usage
a sustainable
show examples
 effect to the country that country will not depend
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 economic
system
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,Thailand has been able to attract many tourists ,using
the
Remove the article
apply
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their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 privileged
Use synonyms
nature
Replace the word
natural
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 sides,like
Add an article
an island
the island
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island
Fix the agreement mistake
islands
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 and beautiful lush green beaches.Money
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
earned from
tourism
Use synonyms
 can impact to
build
Replace the word
building
show examples
more
Change preposition
of more
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 essential buildings and influence
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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other vital conditions.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,ecological problems might start developing caused by visitors to
natural
Correct article usage
the natural
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enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.Oceans,
plants
Correct word choice
and plants
show examples
are belonging
Wrong verb form
belong
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 to a group of rare species,
animal
Correct word choice
and animal
show examples
 types may face
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
damage from the consequences of harm that people do the
nature
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 the survey of
Correct article usage
the
show examples
World Organisation
System
Use synonyms
,there are decreases
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
 wild
nature
Use synonyms
 and ocean
habitants
Correct your spelling
habitats
show examples
 that
results
Change the verb form
result
show examples
 from
damaging
Change the form of the verb
damage
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
Use synonyms
.
Enviromental
Correct your spelling
Environmental
 obstacles can impact
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all sides of
nature
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
pros
Correct article usage
the pros
show examples
 of rising
tourism
Use synonyms
trent
Correct your spelling
trend
impacts
Change the verb form
impact
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
system
Use synonyms
,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
 cons of
this
Linking Words
trent
Correct your spelling
trend
 can cause essential problems to the
enviromental
Correct your spelling
environmental
system
Use synonyms
,in the result can harm
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
animals.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to help readers follow your ideas better.
task achievement
Make sure to check grammar and spelling for better readability.
task achievement
Add specific examples that directly support your points to strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Your essay addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of tourism, which is a good approach.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to illustrate your points, such as the case of Thailand.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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