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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.
The diagram shows information about
sales
Use synonyms
 of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and
bananas
Use synonyms
 in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.
Overall
Linking Words
, in 1999 Denmark was
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the first position in
sales
Use synonyms
 of coffee.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 in
2004
Add a comma
2004,
show examples
 the lead took Uk.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 the least was Sweden in 1999 and 2004.
Further
Linking Words
, In
sales
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
bananas
Add a comma
bananas,
show examples
 the biggest figure was Switzerland in 1999 and 2004,
also
Linking Words
 the smallest
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 in Belgium in 1999. In 2004 the smallest figure was Denmark.
In
Change preposition
Sales
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
 of coffee
all
Change preposition
in all
show examples
 five countries increased,
for
Linking Words
instance
Add the comma(s)
instance,
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Switzerland in 2004
two
Add a missing verb
were two
show examples
 times bigger than in 1999.
Also
Linking Words
rapid
Correct article usage
a rapid
show examples
 increase was in
sales
Use synonyms
of Uk
Correct your spelling
in the UK
show examples
 by 18.5 from 1999 to 2004.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 in two countries from the five decreased.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 In Sweden and Denmark was decreased by two times.
Swizerland
Correct your spelling
Switzerland
 had
rapid
Add an article
a rapid
show examples
 increase in
sales
Use synonyms
 of
bananas
Use synonyms
 from 15 to 47.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, bananas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rapid" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fairtrade sales
  • significant growth
  • trends and patterns
  • market expansion
  • sustainable consumption
  • ethical products
  • consumer awareness
  • economic impact
  • percentage increase
  • market share
  • profit margins
  • trade initiatives
  • consumer behavior
  • retail figures
  • economic indicators
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