IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that climate has the greatest affect on people's way of life. Others believe that the economy of a region has the greatest effect. This is both the views and give your opinion.

One reason why some
people
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 claim that
climate
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 has the greatest effect on
people
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's lives is that
climate
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 affects daily activities
such
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 as clothing, food, and shelter.
For instance
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, in cold climates,
people
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 might wear heavier clothes and cannot grow most crops compared to warm areas.
This
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 has a direct impact on agriculture, food availability, and even the cost of living.
In addition
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,
climate
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 and weather conditions can influence
people
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's moods.
For instance
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, in colder regions, many
people
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 are unable to enjoy outdoor activities
such
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 as going to the beach, which can lead to feelings of boredom or sadness. In some extreme cases, long winters or frequent storms may cause mental health issues
such
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 as seasonal depression.
On the other hand
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, the economy influences job opportunities and income.
For example
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, rich regions offer more jobs and services, impacting the lifestyle of the
people
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 living there.
Moreover
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, the economy of a region plays a major role in shaping
people
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's way of
life
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 because it directly affects their access to basic needs and opportunities.
For instance
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, in wealthy countries,
people
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 usually have access to better healthcare, which improves their quality of
life
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. They can have regular check-ups, advanced treatment, and live longer. Economic stability
also
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 allows governments to invest in infrastructure, education, and social services that make
life
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 more comfortable for citizens. From my perspective, I think
climate
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 has the greatest effect on
people
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's lives. In some cases,
climate
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 can negatively impact
people
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's standard of living, forcing them to change their lifestyle or move to another region. Natural disasters
such
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 as floods, droughts, or hurricanes can destroy homes, disrupt communities, and force
people
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 to start over in entirely new places. In conclusion,
while
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 some
people
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 believe
climate
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 plays the most important role in shaping how
people
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 live, others think that economic conditions are more influential. In my opinion, the
climate
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 has a greater
overall
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 impact, as it affects our lifestyles, regions, and the general quality of
life
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.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly express your main opinion in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion to strengthen your response.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words (like 'however', 'for instance', 'in addition') to help guide the reader through your ideas.
task achievement
Your examples about climate and economy are relevant and help explain your points clearly.
coherence and cohesion
The structure is clear; you have a good introduction and conclusion with well-organized paragraphs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • climate
  • economy
  • lifestyle
  • affect
  • people
  • region
  • job
  • income
  • clothing
  • food
  • shelter
  • rich
  • poor
  • opportunity
  • services
  • culture
  • habits
  • health
  • technology
  • quality
  • education
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