'Some people think that it's a good idea to socialize with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it's important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some
people
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argue that
,
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apply
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socializing with co-workers is crucial to enhance creativity and performance at the workplace,
however
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, others opine that personal
life
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is more important to leading a stress-free
life
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. I think privacy plays a significant role in everyone's
life
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.
This
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essay will discuss both views in subsequent paragraphs.
To begin
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with, building friendships with colleagues and meeting them in your leisure time helps
people
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to make a strong bond with each other. They share their ideas properly which leads to a variety of perceptions, and ultimately it can help to enhance creativity.
As a result
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, not only
the
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does the
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company get better outcomes, but it can
also
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be beneficial for employees, as they get incentives for great work.
Moreover
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, some
people
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feel shy at first when they meet each other as they get to know each other by spending some weekends together,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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can help them to combat the stress of loneliness.
For example
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, when I first started work in a foreign country, I felt stressed
due to
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cultural differences and different workplace practices,
then
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I met my coworkers and Kumar and we planned our weekends and they helped me to adapt to
Western
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the Western
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workplace.
However
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, sometimes it is significantly important to spend quality time with your family and relatives, which assists you
to
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in
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make proper work-
life
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balance. I think it is more essential because family is
also
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a responsibility and you should not ignore them.
For instance
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, many
people
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weaken their relationships
due to
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solely focusing on
professional
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their professional
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Use synonyms
life
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lives
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. In conclusion,
although
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spending some leisure time with colleagues is important to build a strong relationship with each other, the importance of the family should not be overlooked.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea that links back to your overall argument.
task achievement
Try to include more examples in the introduction to show the different views clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Improve sentence structure for clarity and avoid long sentences with too many ideas.
task achievement
Good effort in providing personal experiences to support your viewpoint.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is important.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • professional boundaries
  • team-building activities
  • mental health
  • cohesive work environment
  • personal development
  • workplace relationships
  • informal networking
  • job satisfaction
  • clear boundaries
  • personal well-being
  • common goals
  • burnout prevention
  • sense of belonging
  • achieving balance
  • privacy maintenance
  • career benefits
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