IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You have recently heard that a friend of yours has had some problems as a result of some unusual weather. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter:      -  express your concern (i.e. say you are sorry to hear what has happened)
     -  tell him/her about a similar experience that you once had
     -  give some advice, or offer help

Dear Sam , I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you in a radiant of health and good spirits. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to show my concern regarding the damage
of
Change preposition
to
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 your house ceiling
due to
Linking Words
 a natural disaster. I came to know about the tornado through a news channel which was really excruciating news .
This
Linking Words
 thing happened
last
Linking Words
 year
to
Change preposition
apply
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me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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when I used to live in Taxis ,
due to
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 torrential weather and hail , the windows and doors of my house
got
Verb problem
were
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 devastated
hence
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 , it ruined my entire place . I will send you
a
Correct article usage
the
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 contact number of a contractor who will repair the ceiling at
very
Add an article
a very
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 reasonable price and on top of it he can offer you a discount . For
a
Correct article usage
the
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 time being , you can come over to my place along
your
Change preposition
with your
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 family and we will have
great
Change the article
a great
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 time together
thus
Linking Words
 , it will help to reduce your stress and anxiety . I am looking forward to seeing you . Yours lovely Harv

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coherence and cohesion
Try to have clearer topic sentences for each paragraph.
task response
Make sure to follow the formal letter format more closely.
task achievement
You expressed your concern well in the introduction.
task achievement
You offered a solution and made a kind offer of help to your friend.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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