Wnte about the following topic: Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Its
Correct pronoun usage
It
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is widely believed that an individual can become the
most
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apply
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happiest person in the world if they
possess
Correct subject-verb agreement
possesses
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wealth
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. As
the
Correct article usage
apply
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money
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can provide access to everything
such
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as travel, luxuries, properties, and investments.
However
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, others argue that
money
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cannot buy happiness and
individuals
Correct word choice
that individuals
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can only find true
joy
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by experiencing
Use synonyms
fulfillment
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fulfilment
show examples
.
This
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essay will discuss both the
persceptives
Correct your spelling
perspectives
. The first point of view, suggests that
wealth
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equals
to
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apply
show examples
happiness. I agree with
this
Linking Words
notion as everything in the world has a price.
For instance
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, if an individual is passionate about travelling, they can only do it if they have enough
money
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to pay for travel expenses
such
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as
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
and airplane fare.
Moreover
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, individuals with secure financial backgrounds can own their desired materialistic possessions
such
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as luxury cars, bags and shoes.
Additionally
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, they can have
a
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apply
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financial independence to invest in properties or business ventures to
further
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increase their
wealth
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.
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This
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These
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things provide independence, stability, and comfort to an individual, which can only be secured or owned by
money
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, but these attributes can not guarantee true
joy
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. The second point of view, suggests that fortune can not buy
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fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
, which
assist
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assists
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individual's
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individuals
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to experience
Change preposition
in experiencing
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joy
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. The warmth of a loving family and
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
support of
an
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a
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close confidant
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
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emotional stability, fostering profound
moment
Fix the agreement mistake
moments
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, which give life
a
Correct article usage
apply
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meaning.
For instance
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, a fun dinner at a family gathering can foster a loving environment where an individual can feel loved,
cherish
Wrong verb form
cherished
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, and cared
.
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for.
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These emotions provide a sense of
Use synonyms
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
.
A true
Remove the article
True
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happiness comes from family, love, care and support, which can not be bought with currency.
Thus
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,
money
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cannot buy
true
Add an article
a true
the true
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sense of
joy
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. In conclusion,
while
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I agree that
money
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is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
intergral
Correct your spelling
integral
part of our lives, providing stability, security, and independence to travel and buy
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
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that an individual desires.
However
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, securing
wealth
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is not
a
Correct article usage
the
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main way to be happy. The true way to experience
joy
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is by sensing
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fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
. Which an individual can experience by being loved, cherished, cared
, and
Change preposition
for, and
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supported by family and
love
Change the form of the verb
loved
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ones.
Therefore
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,
money
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can only buy desires
not
Add the comma(s)
, not
show examples
true
joy
Use synonyms
.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea that links back to your thesis.
task achievement
Use clearer examples to show how money and other factors contribute to happiness.
coherence and cohesion
Improve sentence structure and grammar to make your writing easier to read.
task achievement
You presented both sides of the argument, which is good for task achievement.
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