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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays, parents give their children more freedom than parents did in the past. Is this a positive or negative development?

In today’s world,
children
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 are receiving more
freedom
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 compared to the past, and
this
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 can have significant effects on their future development.
While
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 I believe that independence is crucial for a child’s growth and confidence, I partially agree with the idea that
parents
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 today are giving too much
freedom
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 to their
children
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.
To begin
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 with, giving
children
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 more
freedom
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 can be beneficial for their future. When
children
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 are allowed to make their own choices and pursue their
interests
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, they gain confidence and learn to take responsibility for their decisions.
Parents
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 should understand and respect their
child’s
Fix the agreement mistake
children’s
show examples
interests
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 as they grow, which can help them succeed in the future.
For example
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, research from a university has shown that
children
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 who receive support from their
parents
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 in pursuing their
interests
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 tend to do better in school and other activities.
However
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, too much
freedom
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 can
also
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 have negative effects. If
children
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 are given complete
freedom
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 without proper guidance, they may lose focus and develop bad habits. It is important for
parents
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 to find a balance between giving
freedom
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 and providing guidance.
According to
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 an article in The Guardian,
parents
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 who pressure their
children
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 only for academic success and ignore their personal
interests
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 often see their
children
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 developing negative habits and struggling emotionally. In conclusion,
while
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freedom
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 is important for
children
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’s development,
parents
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 should provide it in moderation. It is essential to consider the child’s
interests
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 and provide both
freedom
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 and guidance to ensure their
overall
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task achievement
Make sure each point is explained clearly and with more examples.
coherence
Use a wider variety of linking words to connect ideas better.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic, which is great.
coherence
You recognize both sides of the argument, which shows a good understanding.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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