IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that online education is better than traditional classroom learning. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The topic of whether online
education
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 is more effective than the conventional
one
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 is
a
Change the article
an
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 ongoing debate.
This
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 essay totally agrees with
this
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 statement since learning online not only offers flexibility but
also
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equality
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 to
students
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.
One
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 key component of the effectiveness of online learning is how flexible it is to scholars. Unlike
tradtional
Correct your spelling
traditional
 offline
education
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 which forces
students
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 to go to school regularly if they want to get an adequate understanding of academic knowledge, online forums provide available courses compiled by teachers, allowing them to freely access
anytime
Correct pronoun usage
them anytime
show examples
.
Furthermore
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, learning online
also
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 allows
students
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 to pick their own
shedule
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schedule
that is
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 aligned
to
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with
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 their favor, meaning that they are able
put
Add the particle
to put
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 their focus on gear easily without being restricted by
a fixed schedules
Correct the article-noun agreement
a fixed schedule
fixed schedules
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, these points have shown how the flexibility of online learning has a positive
impacts
Correct the article-noun agreement
impact
show examples
 on learners. Another key benefit of learning online should be
equality
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 between
students
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 through personalized lessons. Simply put, these lessons provided by virtual classes are made to be tailored
the
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to the
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students
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' ability,
therefore
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 enabling them to absorb academic knowledge
in
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at
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 their own pace.
For example
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,
students
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 who have problems
wiht
Correct your spelling
with
 comprehending knowledge are given specialised courses that involve lessons at
relatively
Add an article
a relatively
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 slow pace
as well as
Linking Words
 online tutors, reflecting a sense of
equality
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 when it comes to
educaton
Correct your spelling
education
 accessibility.
This
Linking Words
 approach will definitely encourage all types of
students
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 to consider
education
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 as a crucial part of
success
Correct article usage
the success
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 path.
On the other hand
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, critics often argue that virtual learning platforms cannot replace traditional
Use synonyms
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of social interactions. It is believed that learners are not able to socialize with each other when taking online
education
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, which is easily achieved in mainstream schools where
students
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 have opportunities to interact with peers, not only broadening their social circle but
also
Linking Words
heplping
Correct your spelling
helping
 them
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
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 soft skills
such
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 as communication
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
.
As a result
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,
students
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 might be less sociable, which is detrimental to their
peronal
Correct your spelling
personal
 growth.
However
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,
this
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 point overlooks the appearance of online social networking platforms where not only can pupils still be sociable but their connectivity with friends
also
Linking Words
 remains strong. In conclusion, despite minor concerns of lacking social interactions, online
education
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 is still more effective than the conventional
one
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 because of its
flexiblity
Correct your spelling
flexibility
 and
equality
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.
Ulitimately
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Ultimately
, there should be more open views toward
this
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 new approach.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your main point. It should clearly show whether you agree or disagree and why.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use better linking words to connect your ideas smoothly. This will help the reader follow your points.
coherence and cohesion
Check for spelling and grammar mistakes, as they can distract from your main message. Spending time proofreading can help improve clarity.
task achievement
You have clearly stated your agreement with online education being better than traditional methods.
task achievement
Your essay covers important points about flexibility and equality in online learning, showing good understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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