IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

There is too much noise in many public places in cities. What are the causes of this problem? What can be done to solve the problem?

Noise
Use synonyms
 is something that many
people
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 encounter on a daily basis in
cities
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. The potential causes of
this
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 issue are urbanization
as well as
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 increased usage of public
transportation
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,
whereas
Linking Words
 different solutions,
such
Linking Words
 as the development of rural areas and improved public
transportation
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, should be taken into account to tackle problems. First and foremost, one of the causes of too much
noise
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 is an increase in the number of
people
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 in the suburbs. Many countries prioritize their major
cities
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 and allocate a significant proportion of their budgets to build public facilities and better infrastructure, which in turn makes these
cities
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 advantageous areas for individuals.
Consequently
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,
people
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 move from the countryside and leave their houses to start a new life in
cities
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, where they can easily access public services, and
as a result
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,
cities
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 become crowded and noisy areas.
Furthermore
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,
metro
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 stations have become one of the noisiest public places in recent years. As the number of eco-conscious citizens rises, more
people
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 tend to utilize
this
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transportation
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 system
instead
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 of their private vehicles to protect environmental sustainability by decreasing the amount of harmful gases released from automobiles. One of the viable solutions would be spending much more money on the improvement of the countryside. If governments construct new houses, hospitals, and institutions, and offer new job opportunities in territories that are abandoned by their previous residents,
then
Linking Words
people
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 would not feel the need to move to large
cities
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, and
thus
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, they would be less concerned about the
noise
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.
Moreover
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, improving
transportation
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 infrastructure is another way to solve
such
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 issues. Because of the lack of trains,
people
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 wait for a
while
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 and the
metro
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 becomes overcrowded, which in turn makes
noise
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 inevitable.
Therefore
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, much more money should be invested to expand
metro
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 services. In conclusion,
noise
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 has become an issue in the
last
Linking Words
 few decades because of urbanization as nations take better care of their main
cities
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, and
thus
Linking Words
 the public’s shift away from using cars to preferring public transport. To solve these problems, it is crucial to make considerable investments to improve living conditions in the countryside
as well as
Linking Words
 develop the
metro
Use synonyms
 system.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly connects to your main points.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Use clear linking phrases to show connections between ideas.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states the problem and introduces causes and solutions.
coherence and cohesion
You have a logical structure in your essay, which helps the reader follow your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • noise pollution
  • urbanization
  • population density
  • traffic congestion
  • infrastructure development
  • public announcement systems
  • street performances
  • noise regulations
  • soundproof materials
  • public transportation
  • designated quiet zones
  • green spaces
  • buffer zones
  • public awareness
  • community efforts
What to do next:
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