Schools are no longer necessary , because children can get so much information available through internet , and they can study just as well at home. What extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that academics
areno
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will be
show examples
useful in future
,
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apply
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because tutees can grab more
knowlegde
Correct your spelling
knowledge
from online sites and they can do self study home.
i
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I
show examples
partially agree with
this
Linking Words
statement because
i
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I
show examples
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
that both online study platforms and schools are crucial in a student's life in future. As far as my view
are
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is
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concerned,
i
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I
show examples
believe that
due to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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technological development everyone can access information through the internet which can
be widen
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widen
show examples
their mental hor izon resulting
to make
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in making
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them perfect in every field.
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
, technological devices
offers
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offer
show examples
flexi-time to people for
grabing
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grabbing
information
any time
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anytime
show examples
and everywhere which makes a person geographically
independant
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independent
.
For instance
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, one of
Correct pronoun usage
my friend
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friend
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friends
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, doing
job
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a job
show examples
in
engineering
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the engineering
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field.He
want
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wants
show examples
to improve his communication skills.But
due to
Linking Words
work
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workload
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load
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load,
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he decided to enhance his speaking skills through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online platforms. Within six months he get
proficancy
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proficiency
in
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the english
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english
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English
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language. now, hehe is
on
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in
show examples
position
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the position
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of manager in
this
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company.
On the other hand
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,
i
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I
show examples
opine that
,
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apply
show examples
schools play
very
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a very
show examples
important role in student's life . There are many things which tutees can learn from school
such
Linking Words
as
,
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apply
show examples
discipilne
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discipline
and time
managemant
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management
. which can make them perfect and active .
Additionally
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, in
acadmic
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academic
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
place
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place,
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they can interact with distinct types of people which
leades
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leads
leaders
to
improve
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improving
show examples
there
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their
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communication skills and makes them
extrovert
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extroverts
show examples
. To recapitulate ,
i
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I
show examples
would reckon that parents should adopt
sagacious
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a sagacious
show examples
approach towards the school and the internet by taking its disadvantages into consideration in order to gain holistic growth with the resplendent walk of life.

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task response
Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction. It's better to say whether you agree or disagree more strongly.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words to connect ideas better, like 'however' or 'for example.'
task response
Be careful with spelling mistakes. Check words like 'discipline,' 'management,' and 'proficiency.' Clear spelling helps your writing look more professional.
task response
Add more specific examples or details to support your points. This will make your argument stronger.
task achievement
You provided clear reasons for both sides of the argument.
task achievement
Your example about your friend successfully improving his skills was a good personal touch.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social development
  • fostering communication
  • personalized guidance
  • immediate feedback
  • replicated
  • structured environments
  • discipline
  • time management skills
  • extracurricular activities
  • nurture talents
  • inculcate
  • sense of community
  • shared learning experiences
  • equal access
  • learning opportunities
What to do next:
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