IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Psychologists have known for many years that color can affect how people feel. For this reason, attention to be given to color schemes when decorating work places such as offices and hospitals.

#psychologists #years #color #people #reason #attention #schemes #work #places #offices #hospitals
The issue of whether
people
 should focus on the tone of location or not is creating a passionate debate; many
people
 support the state of the impact of
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 schemes on emotions. The writer of
this
 essay strongly believes that there are valid
agruments
Correct your spelling
arguments
 for both sides, but
tend
Correct subject-verb agreement
tends
show examples
 to agree with the statement. There can be no doubt that tones of
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 have an influence on how
people
 feel. If you ever watch movies, you can see that in the different
story
Fix the agreement mistake
stories
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 use different shades of
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
, which has
impact
Replace the word
impacted
show examples
 audiences’ moods.
Likewise
, many
health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
 centers, where
people
 have images of dangerous and unsafe
location
Fix the agreement mistake
locations
show examples
, usually paint the place with white
color
 because it makes patients feel comfortable,
relax
Wrong verb form
relaxed
show examples
 and feel safe. Some groups of
people
 think that if they have a new
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
, they will consider
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
color
Fix the agreement mistake
colors
show examples
 that match the objective of the place and what they want visitors to feel.
On the other hand
, we have to accept that some
people
 might
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 attention
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the functions of decorations, which are
practicle
Correct your spelling
practical
 for
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
 places.
For instance
,
instead
 of
select
Wrong verb form
selecting
show examples
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
, most hospitals are chosen from the ability and service mind of doctors and
nurse
Fix the agreement mistake
nurses
show examples
. In a similar
ways
Correct the article-noun agreement
way
show examples
, If some
people
 wanted to take a rest and watch some
serise
Correct your spelling
series
, drama, or movie, they would interested in either the plot of that story or the
actres
Correct your spelling
actress
 list. To
sumerize
Correct your spelling
summarise
 everything that has been started, one thinks that shades of wall
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 and
funitures
Correct your spelling
furniture
 need to be considered;
while
 others
agrue
Correct your spelling
argue
agree
 that it is unnecessary. In my opinion, I agree with the
fomer
Correct your spelling
former
 because
Change preposition
of resonable
show examples
resonable
Correct your spelling
reasonable
 reasons and my personal experiences.
Submitted by dondollaraus on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction
Your introduction effectively presents the debate around the topic, but there is a minor grammatical issue. It should be 'the tone of locations' instead of 'the tone of location'.
supported main points
Make sure to support your main points with more concrete examples and clearer explanations. For instance, explaining specific psychological studies that support the idea would add strength.
relevant specific examples
In the second paragraph, consider elaborating on how colors like blue or green may impact different environments like offices specifically, making your points more diverse and supported.
grammar
There are multiple grammatical and spelling errors throughout your essay. Paying attention to these will significantly improve your overall score.
conclusion
The concluding paragraph reiterates your stance well, but could benefit from a brief recap of the key points discussed.
task achievement
The essay adequately addresses both sides of the argument, which is a notable strength.
supported main points
Your use of examples, such as movies and hospitals, successfully illustrates your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: