IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Online education is as effective as traditional classroom learning. Do you agree or disagree?

There was a debate on whether online
education
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 is more effective than the traditional one.
While
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 learning online raises a concern about distraction,
this
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 essay is in agreement with
this
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 view
due to
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 its flexibility
as well as
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 a custom lesson. It is vital to acknowledge that flexibility is one of the factors generating the effectiveness of
this
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education
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 type.
That is
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 to say, online learning allows
students
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 to choose their own schedules based on their time which will lead to not only balancing
students
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' schedules between studies and hobbies
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but
also
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 spending suitable time for family relationships.
As a result
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, more relaxation and less pressure are the outcome of e-learning. Edited lesson is another essential factor which establishes the positive influence of learning online.
In other words
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,
students
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 can customize their own lessons or schedules which are suitable to their abilities in order to have clear self-development
as well as
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 enhance the effectiveness of self-study.
Therefore
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,
students
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 will be fostered to be more productive and get a certain learning progress.
On the other hand
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, those people who prefer traditional classes often argue that online
education
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 may disturb
students
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' attention. To put it simply,
students
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 who are under control will be distracted by some social networking sites.
This
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 will harm
students
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' focus and reduce the production.
However
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, parents can form discipline and build
habitat
Correct article usage
a habitat
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 and routine for their children.
Thus
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, distraction is not a worthy issue of online
education
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. In conclusion,
although
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 e-learning
concerns
Verb problem
is
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 a distraction for
students
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, its benefits outweigh the
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
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such
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 as providing flexibility and edited lessons.

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your main idea in the introduction and explain it well in the conclusion. This will improve your task response.
coherence and cohesion
Link your ideas more clearly using connecting words. This will help the reader follow your thoughts better.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points. This makes your arguments stronger and clearer.
task achievement
The essay has a clear opinion and stands by it throughout the text. This is good for task achievement.
coherence and cohesion
The points about flexibility and customized lessons are well-thought-out. These ideas form a strong base for your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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