Research has shown that spending much less time in workplace can reduce the use of energy. Thus, some companies close for some days a week. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

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The facts have proved that electricity consumption can be reduced by limiting office
hours
. For the same, most enterprises are open from Monday to Friday so that some resources can be saved on
weekends
. In my opinion, it has more pros than cons as continued
work
from heavy appliances may consume more electrical energy. The employees can get some rest from sound. The primary reason for shutting down the office on
weekends
is that the machinery works all the time and
as a result
, the consumption of power increases and
as a result
the utility bill too.
Thus
, the cost of running the whole system is too high. In a big company, there are more than 100 computers, air- air-conditioners, light
as well as
fans and if the workplace remains shut down for several
hours
, it would indirectly or directly lead to a reduction in the usage of energy.
Additionally
, continuous
work
from the gadgets loses their life span and even raises the cost of maintenance. The fact that most offices or banks globally are closed on
weekends
proves the fact that 5-6
work
days
are healthy.
Secondly
, working seven
days
a week makes the employees exhausted as loud sound is heard by the workers. A person may use headphones for some time but the damage caused by it to ears is more.
Additionally
, long exposure to the noise may result in deafness for an individual. If the office is open for limited
days
, the people working there would be able to get some rest and if one individual works 10
hours
a day and that too 7
days
a week there are chances that the productivity of that person decreases with the time. The government of Canada limiting the
hours
of
work
to 40 per week supports the point that rest is essential. For the same cause, some enterprises shut down on
weekends
.
To conclude
, closing the workplace for a couple of
hours
is beneficial as it helps in the reduction of the electricity
as well as
sound eventually leaving a positive impact on the workplace
as well as
the worker.
Submitted by pkaur3443 on

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coherence cohesion
While the introduction and conclusion are present, they would be improved by a more definitive thesis statement and a summarizing conclusion that restates the main points and the writer's position more clearly. Make sure the introduction fully addresses the essay question and that the conclusion effectively wraps up the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Most main points are supported, but some arguments are only superficially treated and could use more detailed development. Work on expanding your points with more specific details and examples to strengthen the argument and add depth to the essay.
task achievement
The response to the task is competent, with an attempt to address all parts of the prompt. However, ensure that the response more comprehensively explores the advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced argument before concluding. This will help in achieving higher marks for task achievement.
task achievement
The essay's ideas could be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Aim to explicate your arguments with precise language and avoid ambiguity. Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that supporting ideas are directly relevant to the task.
task achievement
The essay includes some examples, but they are relatively general and lack specificity. Strengthen your essay by incorporating relevant and specific examples to support your points, ensuring they directly relate to the advantages and disadvantages of reduced workplace hours. Real-world examples or statistical evidence are effective ways of adding weight to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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