Some people believe famous people’s support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while other think celebrities make the problem less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In recent years, the

involvement

Use synonyms

celebrities

Use synonyms

in humanitarian causes has sparked debate. Some argue that their participation can trivialize serious issues,

while

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others believe that their influence helps bring much-needed attention to global challenges.

This

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essay will examine both perspectives before explaining why I believe

celebrities

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play a valuable role in raising awareness. On one hand, critics contend that celebrity

involvement

Use synonyms

can overshadow the core issues aid organizations aim to address. When a well-known figure endorses a cause, media coverage may focus more on the celebrity than on the problem itself.

Additionally

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such

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involvement

Use synonyms

is often perceived as superficial or short-lived.

Celebrities

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might lend their names to campaigns without fully understanding the complexities involved, and their attention may shift quickly to newer projects.

This

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lack of sustained engagement can result in a fleeting spotlight that fails to produce long-term solutions.

On the other hand

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, supporters argue that

celebrities

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have a unique ability to amplify the voices of those in need. With massive social media followings and global visibility, they can draw international attention to causes that might

otherwise

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go unnoticed.

For instance

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, the singer Akon launched a successful initiative to provide electricity and clean water to rural communities in Africa, directly improving the lives of thousands.

Such

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examples highlight how fame can be used as a force for good, mobilizing resources, raising funds, and influencing policy. In conclusion,

while

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there are valid concerns about the potential downsides of celebrity

involvement

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in humanitarian work, the benefits often outweigh the drawbacks. When used responsibly, the influence of famous individuals can be a powerful tool for driving global awareness and action.

Therefore

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, I believe that

celebrities

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play a positive and often essential role in supporting international aid organizations.

zoraiz87Sun Jun 01 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure all points are clear and easy to follow.

task achievement

Add more examples to support your ideas.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion clearly express your main idea.

task achievement

You provided a strong example of Akon helping communities, which is very relevant.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

international aid organizations
draws attention
less important
famous people
celebrities
volunteer support
overshadow
dilute
sustainability
endorsement
genuine
advocacy
deeper understanding
engaged
informed base
committed

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Some people believe famous people’s support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while other think celebrities make the problem less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays artificial intelligence is being used to drive cars. Why is this happening? Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?