The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart compares the
number
Use synonyms
of workers employed based on sex and the type of
job
Use synonyms
in Australia,
last
Linking Words
year.
Overall
Linking Words
, males were highly employed in the
job
Use synonyms
sectors except in clerical and professional
jobs
Use synonyms
where the
number
Use synonyms
of
females
Use synonyms
employed was higher. In the fields of production and trade-related
jobs
Use synonyms
,
men
Use synonyms
dominated over female. Comparatively, the sector that had the highest
number
Use synonyms
of males working was the trade-related
job
Use synonyms
, having 900 males for
such
Linking Words
jobs
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,The
number
Use synonyms
of
men
Use synonyms
taking managerial positions was three times higher than
females
Use synonyms
employed for
such
Linking Words
jobs
Use synonyms
in the 600s and 200s respectively. The clerical
job
Use synonyms
sector had by far the highest
number
Use synonyms
of
females
Use synonyms
employed in their field, reaching just under 1000s and
also
Linking Words
larger compared to
men
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
to that, the figure for
females
Use synonyms
up for professional
jobs
Use synonyms
was more than
men
Use synonyms
at
700s
Correct article usage
the 700s
show examples
and 650s respectively, despite how close it was for the
men
Use synonyms
. Upon comparing
females
Use synonyms
to
men
Use synonyms
, the figures for the
number
Use synonyms
of women taking
jobs
Use synonyms
related to production and trade were negligible.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, job, jobs, females, men with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Employment figures
  • Sectors
  • Significant disparities
  • Gender balance
  • Skewed
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Dominant
  • Inferred
  • Labor market
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Insights
  • Implications
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