IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

Government investment in arts, such as music and theatre is waste of money. Government must invest money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that Government spending in the field of "Arts",
such
Linking Words
 as music and theatre is needless.
On the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 people suggest that authorities should allocate that spending to public services
instead
Linking Words
. I strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. As a fact, Investing in various fields and sectors might gradually improve the country's economy and employment opportunities.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
 should invest funds in different sectors, If they
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 majority of
portion
Correct pronoun usage
their portion
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 any particular field. The
gowrth
Correct your spelling
growth
 rate of that sector will decline over the
peroid
Correct your spelling
period
 of time. As forementioned above if people think that Government investment
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Arts is useless many will
be lossing
Wrong verb form
lose
show examples
 their
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 the lack of
fund
Fix the agreement mistake
funds
show examples
 and people will stop focusing on their skills in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
music and theatrical play.

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your ideas are organized clearly within paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
Use connector words like 'firstly' or 'however' to better guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Check your spelling and grammar to improve clarity.
task achievement
Your opinion is clear and you express your disagreement strongly.
coherence and cohesion
You have started with a clear introduction that presents the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • investment
  • public services
  • money
  • waste
  • support
  • education
  • healthcare
  • transportation
  • economy
  • access
  • society
  • jobs
  • quality of life
  • artists
  • tourism
  • communities
  • funding
  • prioritize
  • benefits
  • stable
What to do next:
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