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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Modern lifestyle mena that manu parents have little time for their children. Many children suffer because they do not get as much attention from their parents as children did in the past. Do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying the fact that many parents have little
time
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 for their children.
While
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 it is a commonly held
to
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apply
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belief that in modern days many fathers and mothers seem to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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less
time
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 with their
kids
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, there is
also
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 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider
that is
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, it is a bad way of parenting they should spend more
time
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 with them.
To begin
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 with,children especially when they are growing
because
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apply
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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need their parents to be around.
in other words
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, young people need guidance and someone who teaches them everything.
in addition
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, their father should be with them every minute and every second.
For example
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, if fathers were around their
kids
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 they would definitely be more polite and
also
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will
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learn from their parents Another point to consider, behaviours might be affected by everyone but with mothers around it is impossible to happen . it is possible to say that mothers are not important in
kids
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' lives.
moreover
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, many children who grow
without
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up without
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 a mother are most likely to be more fragile and have a lot of issues.
For instance
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. Young people who suffer from mother issues, and
kids
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 with that ill more likely to have feelings for older women which is a big problem. In conclusion. despite people having different views, I believe that having little
time
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 with your
kids
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 is unacceptable, so
i
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I
show examples
 strongly disagree with it.

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task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your main point. Explain what you agree or disagree with clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Use paragraphs to separate your different ideas. This helps the reader follow your argument more easily.
coherence and cohesion
Check your grammar and punctuation. There are some mistakes that make your essay hard to read.
task achievement
You have provided some good examples to support your points, which helps to explain your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes your opinion clearly, which is a good way to end the essay.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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