In some countires, many young people choose to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting universitiy studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages. Do the adv outweighed by the disadv

There can be no doubt that the topic of what high schoolers should do post-graduate is one which deserves some consideration. It is the view of

this

Linking Words

writer that the evidence is on the side of those who believe

this

Linking Words

is a positive trend. Central to

this

Linking Words

issue is the point that

this

Linking Words

allows students to gain experience.

This

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

the fact that travelling gives out

opportunity

Add an article

the opportunity

an opportunity

show examples

for pupils to open their

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

which later benefits them with the right career path. One should

also

Linking Words

note that post-graduate is an ideal period to see the world

while

Linking Words

working since they have plentiful time to reconsider and

trying

Wrong verb form

try

show examples

new things. A clear-cut example of

this

Linking Words

would be Vietnamese students where the majority of whom started university as soon as they graduated which later, they

regetted

Correct your spelling

regretted

rejected

as they barely had time for travelling,

additionally

Linking Words

, they struggled to find jobs because of lacking necessary skills. Relaxation should

also

Linking Words

be taken into account. As should be self-evident, high school is extremely stressful and demanding as pupils are forced to prepare for upcoming exams

as well as

Linking Words

expected to be ready before every

lessons

Change to a singular noun

lesson

show examples

. It should

also

Linking Words

be mentioned that university studies are

similarly

Linking Words

demanding and stressful with dissertations and essays and tight deadlines. Because of

this

Linking Words

, relaxing after finishing high school is necessary and urgently needed so as to see the world as aforementioned and relax.

However

Linking Words

, there is a different point of view which holds that taking a gap year causes high schoolers to lose track.

This

Linking Words

can be

atributted

Correct your spelling

attributed

to students who soon become lazy prior to

chase

Wrong verb form

chasing

show examples

short-term pleasure

instead

Linking Words

of pursuing higher education.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, one should acknowledge that by enjoying, they are risking to sink deeply

Change preposition

into

show examples

the pleasure cycle where they are constantly seeking

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

more.

This

Linking Words

is supported by a recent study by Cambridge

university

Capitalize word

University

show examples

, which indicated that 30% of drop-outs in small

institution

Fix the agreement mistake

institutions

show examples

in the US are those who previously took a year to experience life.

Thus

Linking Words

it can be seen that losing track is outweighed by gaining experience and relaxing.

Therefore

Linking Words

, there is ample evidence

to conclude

Linking Words

that dismissing a full year before starting higher education is mostly positive.

muscovytomeaTue Jun 10 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to clearly present your main points and directly relate them to the question throughout the essay. Some points were not fully connected to the overall argument.

coherence and cohesion

Use more linking words and phrases to help your ideas flow better from one to the next. This will improve how your paragraphs connect with each other.

task achievement

Try to support your points with specific examples that clearly illustrate your argument. This can strengthen your overall impact.

coherence and cohesion

Work on ensuring that your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. These are important for framing your argument and summarizing your points.

task achievement

You provided a balanced view on the topic, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages clearly.

task achievement

The ideas about gaining experience and relaxation are very relevant and important points to mention.

coherence and cohesion

You have made a good effort to connect your arguments back to the needs of students after high school.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

365 words

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In some countires, many young people choose to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting universitiy studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages. Do the adv outweighed by the disadv

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that an efficient public transport system is the most important factor in the development of a modern city. Others argue that aspects such as healthcare, education, and public safety should take priority. Discuss both views and give your own opinion:

It is predicted that the use of robots in our life is on the rise. What role do they play? Do you think robots will be of help in the future?

Advertising is becoming more and more common in everyday life. It is a positive or negative development?

CEOs and executives should be paid the same salary as an average worker in a company. To what extent do you agree or disagree?