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The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants
The line graph provides information about how many men and women attended the sessions organised in the evenings at an adult educational institution focusing on four subjects during 2009.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the pie chart depicts the age of the enrolled students.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 a majority of females were interested in acquiring knowledge in comparison to males.
However
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, the highest proportion of people who took classes were senior citizens. In the context of drama, the number of girls who participated in the roles was double
in contrast
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 to boys accounting for 20 and 10, respectively.
Additionally
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, more than 20 individuals from both genders enjoyed painting
while
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 there were few participants who were keen on learning about sculptures.
Moreover
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, around 40 women and 20 men were dedicated to
learn
Change the verb form
learning
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 the language, making it one of the most popular subjects.
Furthermore
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, the least interested age group consisted of youngsters and adults forming 16 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of the total candidates.
In addition
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, 16 per
cent
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 of students aged 30 to 39 and 26 per
cent
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 of the people fell in the category of 40 to 49
while
Linking Words
 the proportion of aged people was considerably higher resulting in forming 42 per
cent
Use synonyms
 of the population of the centre.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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