IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Countries should try to produce all the food for the population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying that a large number of
food
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products
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 are imported from other
countries
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 these days. In relation to
this
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, some people suggest that governments should improve their
food
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 production industries and reduce
food
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 importation. I completely agree with
this
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 notion, as several benefits can be gained in the agricultural sector if
countries
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 enhance their
food
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 sources. The reduction of
food
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 importation and the improvement of the
food
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 industry of
countries
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 should be prioritized for several reasons. The most conspicuous one lies in the fact that
countries
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 should be independent and self-reliant not only for the present but for the future generation as well. If government leaders exert efforts to improve the
food
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 manufacturing industry, innovations are more likely to take place.
For instance
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, advanced
food
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 processing or farming technologies can be invented, benefitting the people and society. Needless to say, limiting the reliance on other
countries
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 in terms of
food
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 production is advantageous in many ways. It is
also
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 worth noting that businesses and consumers can gain significant benefits if
countries
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 strengthen their
food
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 production and limit
food
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 importation. When it comes to business organizations, they can gain more profits, as the financial resources allocated to tariffs and logistics can
also
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 be minimized. People can
also
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 consume healthier
food
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products
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, as the time spent on transporting
food
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 is reduced. It is quite clear that fruits imported from other
countries
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 contain chemicals that extend the longevity of shelf life. If the public has access to local fruits, vegetables, and other
food
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products
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, they can have a healthier diet, as consumption of preservatives is eliminated. In conclusion,
while
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 importing
food
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products
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 may have benefits, I would assert that transporting as little as possible provides greater advantages,
such
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 as improving agricultural industries and maintaining a healthier society.

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task achievement
Expand on your examples to provide more details or explanations.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words to enhance the flow of your writing.
task achievement
Consider adding a specific counter-argument to show understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic.
coherence and cohesion
You presented clear reasons why food production should be prioritized.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • self-sufficiency
  • trade dependency
  • food security
  • sustainable agriculture
  • local economies
  • carbon footprint
  • supply chain
  • food miles
  • agricultural sector
  • domestic production
  • import substitution
  • food sovereignty
  • global supply chains
  • trade imbalances
  • food standards
  • economic resilience
  • biodiversity
  • cultural heritage
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