IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You are going to take a short holiday in Singapore and you want to rent a holiday apartment while you are there. Write to the tourist information office. In your letter: • explain what you need • say when you plan to be there • ask for information about prices

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Dear Tourist Information
officers
Capitalize word
Officers

The word officers should be capitalized in this context.

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, My name is Robbie and I am writing
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 email to enquire about some information about planning my stay in Singapore between 1st October to 5th October. I would like to have some support in renting an apartment for the trip, as I am unfamiliar with the city's geography. Starting with the apartment location, I would prefer to stay somewhere convenient with accessible public transportation.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is extremely crucial for my trip because I intend to go sightseeing around the city.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 to
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it will
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 be better if the place is cosy and tranquil, as I am quite sensitive to noise when sleeping.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I wonder
the
Change preposition
about the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 cost of renting a place for 5 days in Singapore.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is because, as a university graduate with a relatively restricted spending budget, I am keen to search for affordable renting options.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it would be really helpful if you could share some rental websites or links that I can look for budget short-term rentals. Thank you for your consideration and I look forward to hearing from you. Regards, Robbie

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coherence and cohesion
The letter is generally well-structured, but consider breaking down some of the longer sentences for clarity. This will make your ideas even more accessible to the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly separate your requests and preferences for the apartment, possibly in different paragraphs, to enhance clarity.
task achievement
The tone of the letter is polite and appropriate for a formal request, which is commendable.
task achievement
You effectively conveyed your needs and constraints, making it easy for the recipient to understand your situation.
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