Write about one advice that very important for you before you came to US, and who that person said it? why you think it is important?

The advice I got before I came to the US,

that

Correct word choice

which

show examples

I really want to mention is one of the most important things my friend told me. My friend told me I must be interested in the different cultures in the US

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because that will help me know what behaviour people don't like.

For example

Linking Words

, if I see someone do something not normal for me I must respect that. One day I saw a man with his son walking on the street and the kid started yelling at his father using bad words and the father was trying to be kind

with

Change preposition

show examples

him.

This

Linking Words

is strange for me, in my culture, we must be kind to our parents

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and don't

yelling

Change the verb form

yell

show examples

at them.

Finally

Linking Words

, I just remembered my friend's words

then

Linking Words

I realised what he wants he meant by that.

SALFri Jun 20 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence and cohesion

Try to provide a clearer introduction and conclusion to frame your essay. This helps readers understand your main point from the start and what you want to leave them with at the end.

coherence and cohesion

Use more linking words, like 'for example', 'however', and 'in addition', to connect your ideas better. This will help your essay flow more smoothly.

task achievement

Expand on your points. You mentioned your friend's advice but could share more about why understanding different cultures is important to you personally.

coherence and cohesion

Check grammar and punctuation to improve clarity. For example, use commas to separate ideas clearly and make your writing easier to read.

task achievement

You provided a personal example that relates well to your friend's advice. This shows a good understanding of cultural differences.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

140 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest? excitement
In the rapidly changing world, the issue of being inactive exercise become a big deal even though each and every part of cities has a gym centre. The balanced division of problems and solutions will be explored in this essay along with the conclusion in upcoming paragraphs.
7.5
band
In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?
Having a residence is considered essential for some individuals in certain countries instead of renting one. I believe that this is a positive trend for several reasons.
7
band
Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Living in a country where one must communicate in a foreign language can indeed lead to significant social and practical challenges. I agree with the statement, as the implications of language barriers can affect various aspects of life, including social integration, access to services, and employment opportunities.
6.5
band
Some people believe that it would be beneficial if employees worked three or four days per week rather than five or six days. Why is this? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
One of the most controversial topics in this busy society relates to whether the introduction of fewer working days brings more benefits or not. In this essay, I elaborate on the reasons why a majority of employees believe it with some previous evidence.
6
band
It could be argued that technology makes our lives easier and simpler. But there are certainly people who feel life has become more complicated due to modern inventions. Which opinion do you agree with? In your essay, include supporting details.
Some people argue that new inventions have changed our lives in a positive way, while others say it has made life more difficult since technology develops at a fast pace. I totally agree that technology has made our lives smoother than it used to be because now lots of tasks, such as going to the bank or buying food, can be done through the phone, and communicating with people has become much faster.

Write about one advice that very important for you before you came to US, and who that person said it? why you think it is important?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest? excitement

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that it would be beneficial if employees worked three or four days per week rather than five or six days. Why is this? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It could be argued that technology makes our lives easier and simpler. But there are certainly people who feel life has become more complicated due to modern inventions. Which opinion do you agree with? In your essay, include supporting details.