In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message? ive reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own nowledge or experience.

there is currently a
debat
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debate
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about children
are
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who are
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often told that they can get anything if they try hard enough ,
this
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essay
essey
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essay
will
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discuss
dicuss
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discuss
some
advantage
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advantages
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and
disadvantage
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disadvantages
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of
this
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trend, one of the
advantage
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advantages
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that
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is that
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you make the
child
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self
confedent
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confident
confidence
with
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his
hes self
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himself
and become more
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intelligence
inteligance
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intelligent
in front of
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his
her
hes
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his
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parents , so if he trying to get
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something
somthing
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something
he will do
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his
hes
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his
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best to
do
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apply
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earn what he
want
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wants
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, and when he
grow
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grows
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up he will learn how to spend
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hes
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his
money smartly because he
lerned
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learned
this
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approach when he was a
child
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,
however
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,
ther
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there
are
also
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some disadvantage ,
such
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as he may feel that
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hes
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his
parents are not
giveing
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giving
him what
child
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may need even
for example
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its
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it's
it is
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just some
toyes
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toys
to spend his time unless he will
work
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hard for it , and he may be jealous of
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hes
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his
her
he's
friends
becouse
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because
there parents buying
every thing
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everything
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for them without ordering some
work
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to do , in conclusion, there are both positive and negative aspects for
this
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way of dealing with your
child
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, I prefer that you should be more
flixible
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flexible
with your
child
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so some times you ask him to
work
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hard to get what he wants and in the other hand you give
hime
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him
somthing
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something
he like
with out
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without
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he doing any
work
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to do

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language
Improve spelling and grammar to make your ideas clearer. For example, use 'confident' instead of 'self confedent', and 'intelligent' instead of 'inteligance'.
content
Make sure you have clear main points for your advantages and disadvantages. It helps the reader understand your message better.
coherence
Try to use linking words to connect your ideas, such as 'firstly', 'next', and 'in conclusion'. This will help your essay flow better.
content
You have made an attempt to discuss both advantages and disadvantages, which is important for this topic.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • resilience
  • self-belief
  • confidence
  • unrealistic expectations
  • talent
  • opportunity
  • pressure
  • stress
  • failure
  • inadequacy
  • collaborate
  • adaptable
  • motivates
  • setbacks
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