IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and received in one year, 2016.

The pie chart presents the
revenue
Use synonyms
 stream
as well as
Linking Words
 the expenses of a
charity
Use synonyms
 based in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 for
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
revenue
Use synonyms
 that the
charity
Use synonyms
 generates over the
year
Use synonyms
are coming
Wrong verb form
comes
show examples
 from six
stream
Change to a plural noun
streams
show examples
while
Linking Words
 their expenditures are
breakdown
Correct your spelling
broken down
show examples
 into three categories.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the total
income
Use synonyms
 of the
charity
Use synonyms
 for a
year
Use synonyms
 is almost equal to their expenses. The funds that the
charity
Use synonyms
use
Correct subject-verb agreement
uses
show examples
 for a
year
Use synonyms
are coming
Wrong verb form
come
show examples
 from donated food getting the highest portion with about 86.8% followed by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
community
contributuions
Correct your spelling
contributions
about
Change preposition
at about
show examples
 10.4%. These two are the major
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
 of
income
Use synonyms
 that the
charity
Use synonyms
 uses for a
year
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, program
revenue
Use synonyms
, investment
income
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, government grants and other
income
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is making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 up the remaining 3% of the total
revenue
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, 95.8% represents
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
 expenditure that the
charity
Use synonyms
 mostly spends on which is their program services. It is the major portion of the funds that they
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 yearly followed by fundraising and management and
general
Correct article usage
the general
show examples
 category with 2.6% and 1.6%, respectively.

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task achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly states what the pie chart represents and summarizes the main findings more clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or figures in the conclusion to reinforce the information presented.
grammar and usage
Make sure to check for spelling errors, such as 'contributuions' which should be 'contributions.'
task achievement
You included details from the pie chart which is essential for response.
task achievement
The overall comparison of income and expenditure is a solid aspect of your response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • donations
  • grants
  • fundraising events
  • expenditure
  • administration costs
  • program expenses
  • direct benefits
  • indirect benefits
  • underprivileged children
  • education
  • healthcare
  • shelter
  • nourishment
  • medical treatments
  • basic needs
  • financial sustainability
  • transparency
What to do next:
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