Some people feel that entertainers (e.g. film stars, pop musicians or sports stars) are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

A number of individuals believe that entertainers are overpaid in today's world. I strongly agree with their point because of the ease of their job and how unproductive their job is.
First,
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working as an actor or a singer is easy these days
due to
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the spreading of social media
such
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as TikTok, Youtube and Snapchat , so it is easy to become famous,
then
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a huge number of companies will reach out giving a multi-year contract worth of millions just because you became a media star, based on the views only. To illustrate, there is a teenager from the US who is earning 600.000$ a month only because he is streaming on an online platform.
While
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the really productive humans are earning much less ,
such
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as doctors , teachers and police officers. In order to change
this
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dilemma we are now facing , we as a community have to change our perspective on whom we support,
instead
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of donating on live streams and pressing the following buttons we encourage the real influencers in our lives , who treat , teach and protect us.
In addition
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, governments need to focus more on them and raise their salaries.
For instance
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, In China, Doctors earn 5 thousand dollars a month in salary,
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that
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which
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is a triple what actors could get for a whole movie.
To conclude
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, public figures and entertainers do earn much, and for not a good purpose in general. We can fix that by focusing on the real heroes in our societies by demanding high wages for them and governments to be involved in the solution.

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coherence and cohesion
Provide clearer connections between your ideas. Use linking words to help readers follow your argument.
task achievement
Make sure to expand on your examples and explain their significance more fully.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of sentence structures to make your writing more interesting and engaging.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion that you agree people are overpaid.
task achievement
You include relevant examples, which help to support your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion restates your opinion, providing a strong ending to your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • disparity
  • compensated
  • endorsements
  • overshadow
  • revenue
  • merchandising
  • career lifespan
  • popularity wanes
  • job security
  • strenuous schedules
  • public scrutiny
  • physical and mental toll
  • recompense
  • unique challenges
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