It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some argue that the idea of saving money should be implemented by everyone, with no exception for the younger generation. I agree with the notion that cultivating
such
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a habit from early years can promote financial responsibility and hinder one from debt trap.
First,
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introducing the importance of saving since schooling years is crucial as it teaches one to spend cash responsibly.
This
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way, children can be taught that prioritizing expenses is important to fulfilling basic needs and investments.
Furthermore
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,
this
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lesson
also
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encourages adolescents to prevent any unprecedented events that may occur later on in the future,
such
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as crises.
For example
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, some schools which integrate financial literacy into their curricula have improved students' understanding of spending management. Some parents reported that their children tend to decrease their consumption of toys and junk food.
Second,
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the successful adoption of
such
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a habit can reduce one's ability to handle debt since they are trained to not spend beyond their capabilities. Nowadays,
this
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should be prioritized
due to
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increasing credit facilities in Southeast Asia. Those schemes,
such
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as instant loans and Buy Now Pay Later, make borrowing money easier than ever.
For instance
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, individuals in the region often encounter a debt trap which significantly increases stress levels
due to
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their inability to pay off the bills. In conclusion, I believe that adopting the habit early teaches children an important fundamental to handling money later on in their adulthood. It
consequently
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can improve people's perspectives in prioritizing essential needs and staying away from unnecessary debts.

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task achievement
Ensure that each main idea is fully developed with clear explanations.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use more linking words to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Expand on your examples a little more to show how they support your points.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your opinion on saving money.
task achievement
You have good examples to support your points on the importance of saving money.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well structured, making it easy to follow your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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