Many people beleive that high sugar levels cause more health problems. make it more expensive to reduce the health issues. do you agree or disagree ?

It is thought that foods that are high in sugar level increase the risk of getting
health
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issues, and making it expensive would lower the risk. I totally agree with
this
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statement since
people
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would be discouraged to buy it, and would enjoy healthier options more than they used to. One of the essential reasons why increasing
prices
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of high-sugar snacks would lower
health
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issues is that
less
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fewer
show examples
individuals will opt to buy them. Because
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prices
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the prices
show examples
of junk foods are cheap these days,
people
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tend to consume them more. If they are made more expensive,
less
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fewer
show examples
people
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would consider buying them, and they would look for other alternatives.
For instance
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, a study was conducted in Ampang supermarket in Malaysia where they significantly increased the
prices
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of sweets, and it revealed that
costumers
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customers
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started buying local fruits as a replacement. Another reason why
i
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I
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think it is a good development is because
people
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would get used to eating healthy, and would actually enjoy it. Imposing high
prices
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on sugary snacks would lead
people
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to buy healthier options, including rice and vegetables, which would encourage them to cook them in different ways to match their taste.
As a result
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,
people
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would get used to a healthier plate leading to reduced
health
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problems in the long run.
For instance
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,
although
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unhealthy foods are available for village
people
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, they tend to prefer their own
cusines
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cuisine
, which
are
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is
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made from locally grown
fruites
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fruits
and vegetables. In conclusion, I
Think
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think
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that increasing the
prices
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of unhealthy snacks would have a
postive
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positive
impact on
the
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apply
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society's
overall
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health
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.
That is
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because
people
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will replace them with cheaper
helthier
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healthier
options, and
would
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this would
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influence their preference
of
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for
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the type of food they enjoy.

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grammar
Make sure to capitalize the first letter of sentences and proper nouns.
coherence
Try to use linking words (like 'firstly', 'secondly', 'in addition') to make the structure clearer.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points. This will show more depth in your argument.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion and support it throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • high sugar levels
  • health problems
  • obesity
  • diabetes
  • heart disease
  • reduce consumption
  • public health
  • healthier options
  • negative consequences
  • financial strain
  • low-income families
  • education and awareness campaigns
  • government policies
  • subsidize
  • healthier food alternatives
  • accessible
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