Nowsadays young people spend too much of their free time in shopping malls. This has negative effects on themselves and the society they live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

There is no denying the fact that young people spend too much of their free time in shopping
malls
Use synonyms
.
While
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it is a commonly held belief
This
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has negative effects on themselves and the society they live in, there is
also
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an
argumend
Correct your spelling
argument
that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that I disagree with it.
To begin
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with,the youths are more
enegetic
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energetic
.
In other words
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,they have
alot
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a lot
of powers .
In addition
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,they could
creat
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create
show examples
new
relation ships
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relationships
show examples
.
For example
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,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
student
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
Kuwait
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
figured out
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
more you go to
malls
Use synonyms
, the more you have social relations" by research. Another point
consider
Fix the infinitive
to consider
show examples
,
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
impact of going to
malls
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
having
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
mood.
It
Add a verb
It is
It was
show examples
also
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possible to say that going to
cinema
Add an article
the cinema
show examples
could improve our skills in communication.
Moreover
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, we could increase our
socity
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society
.
For instance
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, the youths could level up the sales in shops. In conclusion,
dispite
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despite
people
haveing
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having
show examples
different views, I believe that going to
malls
Use synonyms
is
crcials
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crucial
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
young people,
becouse
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because
it has
alot
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a lot
of achevements
prograss
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progress
.

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coherence
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it well.
cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas, like 'firstly', 'however', and 'for example'.
task achievement
Try to give more specific examples to support your points.
content
You present your opinion clearly in the introduction.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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