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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some students who were born in 2007 say that they can easily complete their Vietnamese literature graduation exam but they have to intentionally fail it because their parents are poor. What extent do you agree?

It has been reported that some
students
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 born in 2007 claim they are capable of passing their Vietnamese literature graduation exam but choose to fail intentionally
due to
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 their
parents’
Correct your spelling
parent’s
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 financial difficulties.
This
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 assertion raises important questions about the pressures faced by
students
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 and the impact of socioeconomic status on academic motivation.
While
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 I acknowledge that poverty can influence
students
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’ attitudes towards
education
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, I believe that intentionally failing an exam is neither a common nor a justified response. On one hand, the financial hardship experienced by some families may cause
students
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 to feel overwhelmed and discouraged. In certain cases, the cost of
further
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education
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 or societal expectations might appear unattainable, leading
students
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 to believe that passing the exam will not significantly improve their circumstances.
Consequently
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, some might resort to failing deliberately as a way to avoid additional pressure or to align with
perceived
Correct article usage
the perceived
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 realities of their social environment.
Such
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 a mindset reflects the broader issue of inequality in access to educational opportunities.
However
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, I disagree with the idea that intentionally failing exams is a widespread or acceptable solution.
Education
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 remains one of the most effective means for social mobility, and deliberately underperforming undermines
students
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’ future prospects.
Furthermore
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, many schools and communities provide scholarships and support programs aimed at assisting
students
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 from low-income families. By persevering and seeking help,
students
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 can overcome financial obstacles and improve their lives. Encouraging
students
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 to intentionally fail sends a harmful message and neglects the potential benefits of
education
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. In my opinion, the issue highlights the need for greater support systems for disadvantaged
students
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 rather than acceptance of deliberate academic failure. Governments and educational institutions should focus on providing financial aid, counselling, and motivation to ensure all
students
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 have an equal chance to succeed regardless of their background. In conclusion,
while
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 poverty may contribute to
students
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’ discouragement, I do not agree that intentionally failing exams is a common or reasonable response.
Instead
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, society should prioritise removing barriers to
education
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 and empowering all
students
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 to achieve their potential.

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Try to add more specific examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure every paragraph has a clear main idea that links to the overall topic.
coherence and cohesion
Check for any repetitive phrases or sentences and try to vary your language.
task achievement
You presented a clear position on the issue, which is very good.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph flows well into the next and has a clear structure, which helps the reader follow your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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