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Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph and chart below give information on the average daily maximum and minimum temperatures in degrees Celsius and the average number of days with rainfall each month for two Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The graph and chart below give information on the average daily maximum and minimum temperatures in degrees Celsius and the average number of days with rainfall each month for two Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
The given graph illustrates the comparison of average daily maximum and minimum Temperatures based on degrees Celsius between two cities, Brisbane and
Canberra
Use synonyms
, in Australia, over a year,
while
Linking Words
 the bar chart compares the general run for the number of
days
Use synonyms
 that both cities had rain monthly.
Overall
Linking Words
, Brisbane has a higher temperature than
Canberra
Use synonyms
, with under 30 degrees Celsius in January and almost 30 in December. The minimum heat that Brisbane had been exposed to was about 10.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the lowest temperature belongs to
Canberra
Use synonyms
 for the whole year.
Also
Linking Words
, both cities
experience
Wrong verb form
experienced
show examples
 cool weather in July;
however
Linking Words
, it was almost freezing in
Canberra
Use synonyms
. For Brisbandian, the bar chart indicates wild fluctuations. It hit a peak in February and March with 14 rainy
days
Use synonyms
. Afterwards, they had a hot summer with an average of 7
days
Use synonyms
 of rainfall from June to September.
Then
Linking Words
 the numbers rise to 12 in December. For
Canberra
Use synonyms
, the bar chart depicts a slight fluctuation. It started with
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 average of 7 rainy
days
Use synonyms
 in January, which reached 8 in March
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
then
Linking Words
 fell again to 7 in April and May. Following that, there was a jump to 10 from June to October, with the exception of September, with 8 rainy
days
Use synonyms
. Eventually, the year finished with 7
days
Use synonyms
 of rainfall in December.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words canberra, days with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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