IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

More and more people nowadays visit well-known places to take photographs of themselves, without looking at the place. Why do you think this is happening? Is it a positive or a negative trend?

Nowadays many
people
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visit
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 famous places just to take a
picture
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 of themselves, without taking care of the
place
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, I believe that they want just to get many followers because they
share
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 they
visit
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 a famous
place
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. I think
that is
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 the wrong way to do
this
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. On the one hand, many individuals
visit
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 a famous
place
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 just to take a
picture
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 , without care for the history of
this
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place
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 or having an idea about the
place
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 they visited they just want to take photographs to
share
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 with other
people
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 on Instagram or Facebook and get many followers and likes, on their post they
share
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 it.
For instance
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, many
people
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visit
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 Paris to get a
picture
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 of the Eiffel Tower, but they do not know what happens there or have any idea how they built
this
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place
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, they just want to take a
picture
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.
That is
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 a negative way when they go to a famous
place
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 and do not know anything about the
place
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.
On the other hand
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, there is a lot of positive when they
share
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 a
picture
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 on their account, to get many followers or become famous because they
share
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 a post on a famous
place
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, but in the same way, they need to look at the
place
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,
also
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, understand the historical in
this
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place
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, and know information when they
visit
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this
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place
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. In conclusion, many
people
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visit
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 many places without caring about history or having ideas about these places
place
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, they just want to take photographs and
share
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 on Instagram. But they need to know information when they go to any famous
place
Use synonyms
.

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task achievement
Expand your ideas and provide more detail in each paragraph to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to connect your ideas clearly between sentences and paragraphs for better flow.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on improving grammar and sentence structure for better clarity.
task achievement
You raised a relevant issue about the behavior of tourists and the need for awareness.
task achievement
You provided a specific example of the Eiffel Tower, which adds value to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Visual content
  • Landmarks
  • Likes and followers
  • Selfie
  • Trophy
  • Validation
  • Accomplishment
  • Technological advancements
  • Smartphone cameras
  • Photography-focused tourism
  • Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
  • Immersing
  • Local economy
  • Cultural significance
  • Backdrops
  • Photographic evidence
  • Overcrowding
  • Wear and tear
What to do next:
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