IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In a number of countries some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing high speed railway lines for inter-city travel. Others believe this money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

In some
countries
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, there is a debate about whether governments should invest heavily in building high-speed railway
lines
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 between cities or improve the existing public
transport
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systems
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. Both views have their merits, and I will discuss them before giving my own opinion. On the one hand, supporters of high-speed
trains
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 argue that these
lines
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 can greatly reduce travel time between major cities.
This
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 can improve economic activities, encourage tourism, and make commuting more efficient.
For example
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,
countries
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 like Japan and France have benefited from fast
trains
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,
such
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 as the Shinkansen and TGV, which connect cities in a matter of hours.
Furthermore
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, high-speed railways are environmentally friendly compared to car or air travel, as they reduce carbon emissions per passenger.
On the other hand
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, many believe that the current public
transport
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 system should be prioritised. In most
countries
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, buses, metro
systems
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, and regular
trains
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 are still overcrowded, delayed, or poorly maintained. Investing money in upgrading these
systems
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 would improve daily life for millions of people who depend on them. It would
also
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 be more cost-effective, as building new high-speed
lines
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 often requires large budgets, land clearance, and long construction periods. In my view,
while
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 high-speed
trains
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 are beneficial in the long term, improving local public
transport
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 should come first. Many citizens face issues like traffic jams, unreliable services, and unsafe conditions every day. By solving these basic problems, the government can help more people in a shorter time and at a lower cost. In conclusion,
although
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 high-speed railway
lines
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 offer impressive advantages, investing in better public
transport
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systems
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 is more practical and urgent for most
countries
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 today.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure to clearly link your ideas with more transition words to improve flow.
task achievement
Try to add a few more specific examples to strengthen your points.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion effectively.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples like Japan and France, showing good support for your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • high-speed rail
  • inter-city travel
  • economic growth
  • environmentally friendly
  • carbon emissions
  • public transportation infrastructure
  • reliability
  • service frequency
  • cost-effective
  • initial investment
  • accessibility
  • underserved areas
  • regional needs
  • budget constraints
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