Once children start school, teachers have more influences on their intellectual and social development than parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowaday`s
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Nowadays
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, when
children
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start
their
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apply
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school
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,
after
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apply
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that
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apply
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teachers
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affect
Verb problem
have
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more to
students
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students'
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social and academic development than their mother and father. In my opinion,
i
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I
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agree with the statement, as
children
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are spending more time in
school
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compared to
home
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at home
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, and they have more opportunities to develop in
school
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.
To begin
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with,
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children
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children's
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success and growth
are
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apply
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depend on
thier
Correct your spelling
their
school
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and teacher,
as well as
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school
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the school
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sometimes
teach
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teaching
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social development classes.
Due to
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this
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, student spend their eight hours in
school
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, with
teachers
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and friends, so they can learn a lot in
school
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.
Moreover
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,
school
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or some particular
teachers
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can give a basic knowledge to
pipils
Correct your spelling
pupils
, about how to behave in public, and other
mind developing
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mind-developing
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topics, so they can grow as
an
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apply
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individual
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individuals
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.
This
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can
gives
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give
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more confidence to pupils.
For instance
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, there was an article in a
TImes
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Times
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of India which showed that
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school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
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are focusing not only
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on academic
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academic
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academics
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, some schools are teaching social and general
knowldge
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knowledge
also
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to their students,
this
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can help them to behave in public and
teaches
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teach
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them about morality.
Furthermore
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,
parents
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also can
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can also
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teach their child about social and
itellectual
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intellectual
moral
values
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, but
school
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plays
vital
Correct article usage
a vital
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role.
As a result
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of
this
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,
parents
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can guide their son about academic and other
values
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, so they can be motivated as a person.
Furthermore
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,
children
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some times
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sometimes
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also
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follow their
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parents
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parents'
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nature, so if
parents
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have good
values
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towards culture and
society
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society,
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than
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then
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obviously their
children
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will learn
same
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the same
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from them and may apply.
For example
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, there was
a
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apply
show examples
research done
in
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at
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Western Sydney University which mentioned that the
school
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plays
important
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an important
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role towards
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children
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children's
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development
but
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, but
show examples
parents
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also
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plays
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play
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crucial
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a crucial
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role. In conclusion,
children
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spend their most valuable time in
school
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so
teachers
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can develop their career
but
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, but
show examples
parents
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can
also
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guide them for good
values
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and make them good
person
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people
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.
Furthermore
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,

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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Try to improve your paragraph structure. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea with supporting sentences.
task achievement
Use simple and clear examples. Make sure your examples are easy to understand and directly related to your points.
coherence and cohesion
Check your grammar and spelling carefully to avoid mistakes that can confuse the reader.
content
The essay shows a clear opinion that teachers have a strong impact on children's development.
content
You included examples to support your points, which helps to explain your ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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