Some people say that music is a good way of bringing peple of different cultures and ages together To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion ?

this

Linking Words

influential contemporary world vast number of people are

persuing

Use the right word

pursuing

show examples

variety

Correct article usage

a variety

show examples

of activities to relax in.So individuals who are inclining to entertain in

music

Use synonyms

, holding the opinion that

music

Use synonyms

is a paticular way to expressig the sense of culture and about the decade at onec.in my opinion, I believe, the former proposition appears to be more rational and

this

Linking Words

essey will

further

Linking Words

elaborate the statement and will lead to a logical conclusion.

supporting

Fix capitalization

Supporting

show examples

my agreement to the given opinion, I firmly believe that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

music

Use synonyms

is an art which could performe the history and

tradition

Use synonyms

of a

country

Punctuation problem

country,

show examples

solely as it is an imagination of the

lyricist

Check wording

lyricist's

show examples

experiences that the person feels thoroughly in his life. It may be directly posing the conventional background of a nation. To illustrate,

Fix capitalization

show examples

country

Correct article usage

a country

show examples

like India, there is a huge demand for classical

music

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as Karnataka,Barath

etc.

Punctuation problem

, etc.

show examples

, which enormously

illustrate

Correct subject-verb agreement

illustrates

show examples

thereown

Correct your spelling

their own

tradition

Use synonyms

,culture and beliefs.

Linking Words

thus

Fix capitalization

Thus

show examples

this

Linking Words

factor

Verb problem

apply

show examples

clearly

explain

Correct subject-verb agreement

explains

show examples

how

tradition

Use synonyms

spreding

Correct your spelling

spreading

with the songs. Explaining another supporting point for my

agreemant

Correct your spelling

agreement

, it is true that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

culture and age

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

being together each other

while

Linking Words

elaborating

someones'

Check wording

someone's

show examples

thoughts.

This

Linking Words

, in

term

Use the right word

turn

show examples

, means, if a song

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

recognize

Wrong verb form

be recognised

show examples

audience

Correct article usage

the audience

show examples

as it is the best, it must be

relavent

Correct your spelling

relevant

to the time and background they live in.

Therefore

Linking Words

music

Use synonyms

agents target

Verb problem

apply

show examples

entertainig

Correct your spelling

entertaining

people who

adopt

Use the right word

adapt

show examples

to that age.

Consequently

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

hearing and exploring lyrics of a song, anyone will be able to gain

clear

Correct article usage

a clear

show examples

idea

reagarding

Correct your spelling

regarding

the time period and cultural background ,when the song was produced.

To conclude

Linking Words

, I strongly agree with the menace, because

music

Use synonyms

is an art and

kind

Check wording

apply

show examples

of particular subject which

revolve

Correct subject-verb agreement

revolves

show examples

the

Change preposition

around the

show examples

period

Change preposition

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

which it

show examples

was produced

Linking Words

along

Punctuation problem

, along

show examples

with

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

the tradition

show examples

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

of a nation.

sachinishanika2

Jul 9, 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar

Make sure to check your grammar and spelling. Words like 'paticular' and 'perform' were used incorrectly.

coherence

Try to make your ideas more clear and organized. Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph.

task achievement

Provide more examples and better explanations to support your points about music and culture.

positive observation

You have a good introduction that states your opinion clearly.

positive observation

You provide examples from India that relate to your point about music and culture.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Suggestions & mistake analysis
Find every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary
Expand your ideas and use the right words.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
There seems to be increasing trend towards assessing students through exams rather tah than Continual assessments. What are advantages and disadvantage?
In order to access students regarding their field of study in schools and universities, we have seen that there has been an increasing trend for exams instead of frequent practical and theoretical assignments; however, this trend has both benefits and drawbacks which I shall discuss in this essay.
6
band
Some people feel that they must pay high taxes are necessary so that the government will have enough money to give good public services to society. others disagree.
Nowadays, some societies feel that high taxes are necessary so that the government will have enough money to provide excellent public services to society. However, some people disagree with this statement. I will discuss my argument on the matter.
7
band
More and more people are moving to cities to look for work. What problems does it cause? What are the possible solutions?
The number of people, who are moving to urban cities for a week of work, is significantly rising. This problem causes an overpopulation in cities and a decreased figure of citizens in rural areas. The possible solutions to tackle them are substantial investments into the economy of rural regions and improved urban infrastructure.
6.5
band
Some people think that in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollutions and housing problems. To what extent do you agree to disagree with this statement?
These days, several individuals argue that governments should concentrate on decreasing environmental pollution and residential issues to prevent illness and disease. I entirely disagree with that opinion for two reasons.
8
band
Some people think that exercise is the key to health,while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important.Discuss both views and give your opinion
In the contemporary era, health is a basis for every activity,from individuals to society, to become more effective. Some social members believe that working out will lead to being healthy , on the other hand,there are others presuming that owning a well-rounded eating plan is more essential to our body . In my own opinion, I agree with the former and the latter as exercising and having a balanced diet can bring us unexpected advances in our body

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing peple of different cultures and ages together To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

There seems to be increasing trend towards assessing students through exams rather tah than Continual assessments. What are advantages and disadvantage?

Some people feel that they must pay high taxes are necessary so that the government will have enough money to give good public services to society. others disagree.

More and more people are moving to cities to look for work. What problems does it cause? What are the possible solutions?

Some people think that in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollutions and housing problems. To what extent do you agree to disagree with this statement?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health,while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important.Discuss both views and give your opinion