IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Companies that have a long average working time are more economically successful than those companies that do not have a long working time. Do you agree or disagree?

Populace
Correct article usage
The populace
show examples
spend
Correct subject-verb agreement
spends
show examples
 most of their week working at the workplace. It is contended that the longer duration of
work
Use synonyms
hours
Use synonyms
 in offices
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 more profitable
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
 those who have shorter duration of working
hours
Use synonyms
.
I
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
 contradicts the idea of marathon shifts and supports the idea of reduced
hours
Use synonyms
. I will explain my opinion in the forthcoming paragraphs. To
beigin
Correct your spelling
begin
 with,
Spending
Fix capitalization
spending
show examples
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
hours
Use synonyms
 at
work
Use synonyms
 can help
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
workers
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
focus more towards their well-being. To elaborate, if people
will
Verb problem
apply
show examples
provide less
labor
Use the right word
labour
show examples
, they will have more
time
Use synonyms
 to do other activities and focus more towards their health. They will have enough
time
Use synonyms
 to cook food at their respective households, which will
in-turn
Use the right word
in turn
show examples
improves
Correct subject-verb agreement
improve
show examples
 the
overall
Linking Words
 health of employees.
Along with
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
,
managable
Correct your spelling
manageable
 working
time
Use synonyms
 can
also
Linking Words
 upgrade the productivity of companies. Limited
labor
Use the right word
labour
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 can provide
working
Correct article usage
the working
show examples
 population with more
time
Use synonyms
 to replenish their energy and
refreshens
Correct your spelling
refresh
 their mind. A
healthy
Punctuation problem
healthy,
show examples
 fresh brain can develop more innovation and ideas
contributing
Punctuation problem
, contributing
show examples
 to the success of corporations.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even
, fewer
hours
Use synonyms
 of labour provide the
organizations
Use the right word
organisations
show examples
 with ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
benefits
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, we cannot replace the
pons
Check wording
benefits
show examples
 offered by extended
hours
Use synonyms
 of
work
Use synonyms
. Workers have
plentiful
Fix the agreement mistake
plenty of
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 to finish their projects before deadlines who
work
Use synonyms
 for
bigger
Correct word choice
a longer
show examples
 duration of
time
Use synonyms
. When
workforce
Correct article usage
the workforce
show examples
 only
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 have few
hours
Use synonyms
 in a day to
work
Use synonyms
, it
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
show examples
 really difficult for them to complete the
work
Use synonyms
 in the provided
time
Use synonyms
 frame, which can even
leads
Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
show examples
 to stress.
Therefore
Linking Words
, more working
hours
Use synonyms
 can help to mitigate the issue of insufficient
time
Use synonyms
 for completing projects. Conclusively, advantages offered by short working
hours
Use synonyms
 can comfort people with
well being
Use the right word
well-being
show examples
 and improved productivity
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, there are some factors
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as not enough
time
Use synonyms
 for winding up some
tasks
Punctuation problem
tasks,
show examples
 that shouldn't be
negleced
Correct your spelling
neglected
.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea. This helps in understanding your main points better.
coherence and cohesion
Be careful with spelling and grammar. Errors can make it hard to follow your ideas.
task achievement
Try to give specific examples for your ideas. This can help make your point stronger.
task achievement
You show a clear opinion on the topic, which is important for this task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • companies
  • success
  • working hours
  • employees
  • productivity
  • profits
  • dedicated
  • team spirit
  • commitment
  • burnout
  • balance
  • health
  • satisfaction
  • sustainable
What to do next:
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