IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many things that used to be done in the house by hand, are now being done by machines, Does this development brings more advantages or disadvantages?

Machines
Use synonyms
 are now doing many things for humans
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as household tasks.
This
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 essay argues that
this
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 statement has more advantages than disadvantages. As
machines
Use synonyms
 can
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
 one's
time
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 and make homes less dangerous
placess
Correct your spelling
places
,
while
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 the idea of making
people
Use synonyms
 more lazy is invalid. 
House
Use synonyms
chores
Use synonyms
 are now easier than before
due to
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 the fact that many of these
chores
Use synonyms
 are being done by
machines
Use synonyms
.
This
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 has various benefits
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as increasing the
Use synonyms
house
Check wording
house's
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 safety
Punctuation problem
. modern
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modern
Fix capitalization
Modern
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 ovens now have
Correct article usage
an auto
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auto off
Use the right word
auto-off
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 option
so
Punctuation problem
, so
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it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 will be turned off after some
time
Use synonyms
 to prevent the danger of fire. Another benefit is that
machines
Use synonyms
 can
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
 the
time
Use synonyms
 of the adults in the
house
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, so the
people
Use synonyms
 can spend
this
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 free
time
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 doing more important things like working or taking care of family members.
For instance
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, many companies are developing new robots to do
house
Use synonyms
chores
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such
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 as cleaning and doing
lundary
Correct your spelling
laundry
.
On the other hand
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, some
people
Use synonyms
 argue that using
machines
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 made
people
Use synonyms
 less active since they will do most of the daily tasks.
However
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, getting help in doing
chores
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 does not mean that a person is more lazy, especially
that
Change preposition
since
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 now have more
responsibilties
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
 and longer working hours.
Therefore
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,
machines
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 are considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
one of the most helpful tools in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
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 era because they
made
Verb problem
have made
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 our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 less
complecated
Correct your spelling
complicated
.
For example
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, a lot of working mothers use
electrical
Correct word choice
electric
show examples
 cooking pots to start cooking the meal before they get back home. In conclusion,
people
Use synonyms
 now have
more
Correct article usage
a more
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 difficult
life style
Use the right word
lifestyle
show examples
 and getting household tasks done by
machines
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 more advantages than
disadvantaged
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
show examples
 as it will give
people
Use synonyms
 more free
time
Use synonyms
 and
rais
Use the right word
raise
show examples
 the safety of their homes.

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coherence and cohesion
Try to use clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph. This helps the reader understand the main point of the paragraph better.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like 'firstly', 'additionally', and 'finally' to connect your ideas. This can make your essay flow better.
task achievement
In your introduction, mention both advantages and disadvantages clearly to show you understand both sides of the discussion.
task achievement
When giving examples, make sure they are specific and relevant to your argument. This will strengthen your points.
task achievement
You present a clear opinion in your introduction, which sets the tone for the essay.
task achievement
You provide reasons for your opinions, which helps to explain your view on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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