IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Space exploration is too expensive and money should be spent on more important things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a view that a lot of money and other resources are required for the discovery
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
space
Use synonyms
 exploration.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 oppose
this
Linking Words
 notion, I strongly argue in
favor
Use the right word
favour
show examples
, as these things are vital, dangerous fields
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 will demand
to
Change preposition
apply
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strong attention. The technologies are developing significantly day by day. So, many richest countries are racing to reach
space
Use synonyms
 places
such
Linking Words
 as Mars. Being
to
Correct word choice
able to
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 reach Mars will demand a lot of important things and expenses.
Additionally
Linking Words
, it requires many ingenious
people
Use synonyms
 to solve the challenging issues. Because there are many problems along the way.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 always disagree with these aids, because they will get massive natural resources
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it will impact our environment.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 do not support these actions and I always resistance for build
space
Use synonyms
 laboratories around the world. Unfortunately, many
people
Use synonyms
 want to travel in
space
Use synonyms
 and they always
voted
Wrong verb form
vote
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
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 their richest investors. That’s why they build laboratories and different types of harmful zones for training to fly
Use synonyms
space
Change preposition
in space
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. And
this
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 definitely affects
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our nature and causes to decrease
of
Change preposition
in
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 many extinct animals that
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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live in the wild and near these zones.
However
Linking Words
, they think
Correct word choice
that which
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 find some kind of new things in
space
Use synonyms
, and they can travel in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
space
Use synonyms
 where they have
not
Rephrase
apply
show examples
never been in there. As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
, they do not know which impact our nature harmful. Unfortunately, it will cause global problems.
Thus
Linking Words
, they
also
Linking Words
 care
aboutthe
Correct your spelling
about the
 environment and future events. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 many
people
Use synonyms
 want to travel around
space
Use synonyms
, it will impact our Earth and
increase
Verb problem
lead
show examples
 to many problems because of
this
Linking Words
space
Use synonyms
 exploration

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coherence
Make your introduction clearer, stating your main idea directly. Also, improve your conclusion by summarizing your points more effectively.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence
Check your writing for spelling and grammar errors, as these can distract from your message. For example, 'i' should be 'I' and 'build space laboratories' could be phrased as 'build laboratories in space'.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential in IELTS writing.
task achievement
Your essay attempts to discuss both sides of the argument, showing that you understand the complexity of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • exorbitant
  • myriad
  • pressing issues
  • allocated
  • advances
  • direct results
  • pave the way
  • uninhabitable
  • inspirational aspects
  • fuels innovation
  • shared goal
  • intellectual capital
  • budget overruns
  • tangible benefits
  • rationale
  • dedicating
  • returns on investment
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