IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many students today leave their country to go abroad and study in another country. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of doing this.

Have you ever thought why several students
leaves
Correct subject-verb agreement
leave
show examples
 their
country
Use synonyms
 to study? Studying in a different
country
Use synonyms
 may have a great
vital
Correct word choice
apply
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impact
in contrast
Linking Words
there are
Verb problem
to the
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 disadvantages that the student and their
country
Use synonyms
 go through , in
this
Linking Words
 essay I
"
Punctuation problem
apply
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ll
Use the right word
'll
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 discuss
about
Change preposition
apply
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that
Correct determiner usage
the
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 advantages
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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and
disadvantage
Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantages
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 of
this
Linking Words
 issue. On one hand,
while
Linking Words
 many people see that getting your education from another
country
Use synonyms
 has many
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
, there are
also
Linking Words
 many advantages
Linking Words
for
Punctuation problem
, for
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 instance
understanding
Punctuation problem
, understanding
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 the traditions and culture of various
countrys
Correct your spelling
countries
. Another benefit that students can get is
revealing
Verb problem
an understanding
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to
Change preposition
of
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 the different
Use synonyms
country our
Check wording
countries'
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culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
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 and traditions
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 will have a significant
impression
Check wording
impact
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to
Change preposition
on
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 other pupils.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 numerous amount of disadvantages. To give you an idea of some
negatives
Punctuation problem
negatives,
show examples
a
Correct article usage
an
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 article illustrated that 70
percent
Use the right word
per cent
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 of the people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 go to get their education in the United States of America actually
fails
Correct subject-verb agreement
fail
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which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 means that most of the students
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
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 go
aboard
Rephrase
abroad
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 to
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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 do not go
for studying
Change preposition
to study
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 leads to a huge disaster for their
country
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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that is
Linking Words
 because of several reasons
,
Punctuation problem
:
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the
country
Use synonyms
 spent a massive amount of money
to
Change preposition
on
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 tuition fees, accommodation , and salary for nothing. In a nutshell, getting your education and knowledge from another
country
Use synonyms
 is a wonderful thing
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 it does not suit everybody
,
Punctuation problem
.
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you
Fix capitalization
You
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 need to have
a
Correct article usage
an
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 immense amount of responsibilities for many reasons
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
. for
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for
Fix capitalization
For
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example
Punctuation problem
example,
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 you have your
Use synonyms
country
Check wording
country's
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 name and flag behind your back and a family waiting for your achievement.

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task achievement
Make sure to provide a more balanced view by discussing both advantages and disadvantages thoroughly.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the flow by using clearer linking words and phrases between your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your position, and the conclusion summarizes your main points effectively.
task achievement
Provide specific examples or statistics that support your main points, as this will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
You address both sides of the argument, which is important.
task achievement
Your essay shows a good attempt to engage with the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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