IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graphs illustrate the percentage of electrical household tools usage in a state and how much
Use synonyms
hours
Change preposition
of hours
show examples
 spent per week
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
housework
Use synonyms
 in every house from 1920 to 2019.
Overall
Linking Words
, the rate of electrical appliances
ownership
Check wording
apply
show examples
showed an upward trend
while
Linking Words
 the number of
hours
Use synonyms
 spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
housework
Use synonyms
 indicated a downward trend over the period. In 1920,
mostly
Use the right word
most
show examples
 people owned
washing
Correct article usage
a washing
show examples
 machine at
rate
Correct article usage
a rate
show examples
 of 40% and followed by
refrigerator
Correct article usage
a refrigerator
show examples
 at 30%. At that time, there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 almost
not
Rephrase
no
show examples
anyone
Check wording
people
show examples
 using vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 in their house, before it started to skyrocket and could surpass the other two appliances
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between 1940-1945 and peaked at 100% in 1980 and remained stable until 2019. For the refrigerator, the curve saw
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
 increase to 100% in 2000 and remained constant until 2019. Washing machine was the only equipment which saw
gradual
Correct article usage
a gradual
show examples
 increase
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 reached its peak at just over 70% in 2019.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
hours
Use synonyms
 spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
housework
Use synonyms
 in every household moved in the opposite direction. In 1902, people did their
housework
Use synonyms
 at their home for 50
hours
Use synonyms
 per week
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 average. It decreased gradually until
reached
Correct pronoun usage
it reached
show examples
 20% in 1980 and remained stable
to
Change preposition
until
show examples
 its dip
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 10% in 2019.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, housework with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • household appliances
  • time-efficient
  • labour-saving devices
  • technological innovations
  • ownership rate
  • housework chores
  • domestic workload
  • automation
  • advancements
  • trend analysis
  • societal shifts
  • economic impact
  • durability
  • lifespan of appliances
  • maintenance
  • historical comparison
  • time allocation
  • drudgery reduction
  • energy consumption
  • disruption in trends
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