With the increased global demand for oil and gas , undiscovered areas of the world should be opened uo to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

For a long time,

oil

Use synonyms

and

gas

Use synonyms

have significantly contributed to the world’s progress. Few of the masses believe that

due to

Linking Words

the increasing demand for crude

oil

Use synonyms

and

gas

Use synonyms

, hidden

areas

Use synonyms

of the world should be accessed to

maximize

Use the right word

maximise

show examples

resources

Use synonyms

. I partially agree with

this

Linking Words

statement

Punctuation problem

statement,

show examples

in which points will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, there are several reasons in

thr

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

support of the given

statement

Punctuation problem

statement,

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

which the first and foremost is economic growth. Many nations are resource-dependent as they require non-renewable

energy

Use synonyms

sources to

compete

Verb problem

meet

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

the global demand.

Additionally

Linking Words

, the

oil

Use synonyms

and

gas

Use synonyms

industry

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

industrial output and is

also

Linking Words

helping in expanding transportation

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

directly contributes to

grow

Wrong verb form

growing

show examples

a country's economy.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it creates better job opportunities.Admittedly,exploring

thr

Correct your spelling

the

untouched

areas

Use synonyms

of the world for extracting mineral

oil

Use synonyms

and

gas

Use synonyms

will require

labor

Use the right word

labour

show examples

Punctuation problem

;

show examples

Linking Words

therefore

Punctuation problem

therefore,

show examples

the increased demand will significantly increase employment for many

people

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, an article published in The Tribune in 2017 disclosed that with the expansion of jobs in the mining sector, 23.7% of employees got out of

poverty

Correct article usage

the poverty

show examples

line in the Philippines.

In contrast

Linking Words

, there are plenty of reasons to contradict the above statement in which the vital point

iss

Correct your spelling

environmental destruction. Prolonged mining and digging of the earth’s surface for extracting

resources

Use synonyms

will

uprise

Verb problem

increase

show examples

the risk of deforestation, habitat destruction of flora and fauna and could

further

Linking Words

increase the risk of global warming

due to

Linking Words

the emission of greenhouse gases.

Besides

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, it can cost human lives. The process of mining is hazardous to

people

Use synonyms

who are involved in these activities

beacuse

Correct your spelling

because

minerals

emitts

Correct your spelling

emit

poisonous gases that are prone to human health issues.

Furthermore

Linking Words

,extraction can cause manmade disaster as some of the

areas

Use synonyms

are ecologically

semsitive

Correct your spelling

sensitive

For example

Linking Words

, an article was published in 'The Times Of India' in

year

Correct article usage

the year

show examples

2024

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

disclosed that

due to

Linking Words

illegal mining

Add a comma

show examples

many

people

Use synonyms

got trapped inside the cave that they were digging

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

almost 250

people

Use synonyms

lost their lives in the incident. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

opening up undiscovered

areas

Use synonyms

can

fulfill

Use the right word

fulfil

show examples

short- term

Use the right word

short-term

show examples

energy

Use synonyms

goals

but

Punctuation problem

, but

show examples

can drastically damage our earth and the

resources

Use synonyms

will deplete over

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

time.

Instead

Linking Words

, nations

shoukd

Correct your spelling

should

focus on green

fuel

Fix the agreement mistake

fuels

show examples

that are

also

Linking Words

known as renewable

resources

Use synonyms

( solar

energy

Use synonyms

, wind

energy

Use synonyms

and so on.)

akn.sagar

Jul 23, 2025

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Task Achievement

Your essay presents your views but could be clearer. Make sure to state your opinion clearly in the introduction and conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion

Use linking words more effectively to connect your ideas. Terms like 'firstly', 'secondly', and 'for example' can help make your argument easier to follow.

Coherence and Cohesion

Check for grammar mistakes and unclear phrases. For example, 'thr' should be 'the' and 'iss' should be 'is'. This will improve clarity.

Task Achievement

You provide good examples to support your points, like the article from The Tribune about job creation in mining.

Task Achievement

Your understanding of the environmental issues related to oil and gas extraction is relevant and important.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

379 words

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With the increased global demand for oil and gas , undiscovered areas of the world should be opened uo to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Internet technology means people do not need to travel to foreign countries to understand how others live. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some students take one year off between finishing school and going to university in order to travel or to work. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

People in some countries owning a home rather than renting one is considered very important. Why might this be the case? Is this a positive or negative development?

some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this gap year?